:: Me ::

It's been quite sometime since I blog. Maybe just like Pascale, I have lost the interest in blogging. Maybe, it could be due to my emotion that I am going through, I don't really feel like talking, I feel that it's hard for me to open up to people. I wish that I can share what I am going through with people, but it's just too hard for me.

Last Saturday, my zone have a meeting at Riverwalk. I was suppose to reach there by 0930 for training for catcher, but I overslept. The actual meeting starts at 1130. I was thinking of going for the meeting anot, because my ez-link card value is depleting, and I have no money to top up, nor to have a proper meal. It's either I don't have money to top up, or I don't have money to eat. I hesitate for a very long time, then I decided to go. I have a quick bath, because my dad can fetch me to Boon Lay MRT before he go to work. He was actually outside having breakfast with some of my siblings. However, I was about to finish drying myself and he came back. He was not able to wait for me as he was in a hurry. I came out of the toilet, it was 1035. Actually, I was thinking of borrowing money from him first, but I didn't have a chance. I don't know what to do, I was in a loss, I felt emo. It's just so hard for me to go out. Should I just skip Expo service and go for Jurong West service for a time being? It's just a 7 min walk from my house. Can save up to $5 of transportation fees from my house to Expo, and from Expo to my house.

Maybe, I was just going through what Henry is going through after he ORD. No money for travelling, and that's why sometimes it's really hard for him to join us for dinner. You watch people eat and you don't. Maybe, it's good to have blessings from the members once in awhile, but if every week that happens, you won't really feel good at all.

My main concern now is to get a job and save some money. I will be going for a interview tomorrow at Somerset. Hopefully I am able to get the job, although I will miss the chance to go for Saturday zone prayer meetings in future. I couldn't wait anymore, this could be one of the best opportunities for me to earn money. Anyway, I can still go for CG, Service 2, and able to serve in ministry, so it won't be any big issue.

Emotion dying, verge of going insane. . . . .

I Surrender All - True Worshippers

Thank You for the cross that You have paid
For all my sins You’ve sacrificed Yourself
I am nothing Lord without Your grace
You were there to lift me when I failed

As I lift my hands
Pour Your mercy O God
Longing for Your presence now

I surrender all and I will follow You
I surrender all and bring my life to You
I surrender all and live my life for You
I surrender all, I surrender all
To You Jesus

:: Internet Breakdown ::

Internet or modem have emotion? Yes they do. :'( A lightning cause a loud strike and my modem was terrify, thus causing him to shutdown. So, please don't bully your modem. Let it have some rest yeah?

Right now, I am attaching to another Internet source near my house there, Uheaven. A place that is set up quite some months ago or a year ago. Although the place is not really built up so nice, but at least it still have Internet access.

I promise about blogging the BIGBANG Camp. Somehow, I have lost the interest le. =P All I can say is, I really enjoyed this camp alot although I miss the Pulau Ubin trip due to having a dental appointment at NUH in the morning. Anyway, its really cool to be in the camp. My house is Amplified, and my team is Ai-Chong! Haha..

I would like to thank Wei Jian specially. Thanks for standing by me all this while and encourage me to go to camp. Although there were many times I am tempted not to go, but still, I went for it. Thank you so much. Not forgetting Sharon, you have been my emotional support. =) Lastly, all glory goes up to Jesus for keeping me safe throughout the camp! =)

:: Back from Camp!! ::

I'm back from BigBang Camp! The 3 days and 2 nights was a fun one. =) Shall blog more when I'm free! =)

:: Service ::

It's a long walk from Expo MRT station to Hall 1, but the walk seems to be shorten compare to the previous time. Probably it could be due to more exhibitions in Expo than the past when the church shifted to Hall 1? Or probably I was day dreaming while I was walking? Well, anyway, the most important thing is that I can get to go to church on time. =)

We had 3 new frenzs for Service! 2 are from my Connect Group brought by Derek, and they are Ruyi and Ryan. Both of them are just so cute in Jesus name. =P Another frenz is Vivian, who belongs to Kelvin's Connect Group. It's indeed great to see new frenzs keep coming, and that's the power of Prayer! Guess what, we have been conceiving Ruyi in our prayers for a week, and during the altar call, she gave her heart to Jesus! Praise The Lord!! =)

Service was great with Rev. Dr. Robb Thomson. He talks about having abundance in our lives, and about how our life with God. Shall blogged down a few points what he shared impacted me.
1. God will never give you a future that makes Him unnecessary.
2. A life without a harvest is proof you have invested in the wrong people.
3. Giving to God what belongs to Him guarantees God giving to us what grace provides.

God will never give us something that will cause us to be prideful, to declare independence from Him. All of us need God, and we have to make Him to be part of our lives. God is a part of our lives, not apart! He deserve to be the greatest portion in our lives. Well, every time I talk about this, I will feel really guilty. I guess, I must be a doer of my word. I don't want to come to a point whereby I lost something in the end, because the only cure for ingratitude is lost.

After the service, we went over to PS to fellowship. Had tempura chicken set for dinner, which cost me about $4.50, thanks to Yan Qiu for the 10% discount. Hahaa.. Food is not bad, and it was a good time playing the game after that outside PS. We played "Big Fish & Small Fish", and I keep pronouncing fish wrongly, with all kind of funny words. Got shift, shit, etc. Guess I am too much into doing shift in my NS. O_O Hahaha...

Didn't joined them for movies. Wanted very much to go but I have not enough. Prayed that I can have a stable job soon and I would have allowance. =) I want a financial breakthrough in my life! =)

:: ORD ::

The 2 years of journey has come to an end. I have been looking forward to this day for a long long time. In this 2 years, it has given me opportunities working together with different people. It has give me a glimpse of how outside the working world would be like, and I feel that it has been great to be in this unit where I am posted to.

I have mixed feelings when I leave my camp. Looking at some of the buildings that I used to go and the corridors that I have once walk, somehow, there's a feeling of sadness in departing them. Although there would be times of unhappiness, but there are times whereby I laugh together with my friends too. I can say that this place build up some meaningful relationships with my friends, and this is also the place where I like someone so deeply but I didn't confess. Seriously, I have never been so deeply attracted to people before. Hahaa.. Well, somethings are meant to keep for a secret. No worries, I have not been so addicted to this person as much as before, I am slowly giving up thinking and meditating upon this relationship. =P Must slowly let go want mah, how can so fast say I don't love you and immediately next day I don't love you liao? LOL.. Feelings are hard to die off. Anyway, that issue shall reserve for the future.

I feel quite elated when I get my pink IC! Haha.. It's been 2 years being "locked" up. Hahaa.. Embarking a new journey in 2008!! =) 3 more days to BigBang Camp! :D

:: Stepping Out ::

Today was second time serving in Jurong West, but I was serving at the different spot of the auditorium, which is the area where PowerHouse used to be. That area was "anointed" as the spot was pretty cold and I keep trembling. Maybe I should wear a jacket with me next time when I serve.

While the management are still testing and running the new side board, I will be doing the projector system where by I will be flashing the BV 5 lines. Had a SOT student at my side to understudy. Haha.. Well, I am not really nervous as the SOT student has some experience while she serve in the SOT lesson. =)

The experience over at Expo and Jurong are really different. Over at Expo, the equipments have been set up nicely for you, and all you have to do is just to flow with the song and flash the lyrics. However, Jurong West you will have to do the setting up yourself, and I am not quite good at it. Had a good scolding from Rosa cuz she has taught me the previous week but I have forgotten. =P Well, not really a scolding but the expectation of me has gone up to another level. I should learn to "take charge" of the situation. Every single little details I must pay attention of, borrowing power supply from other ministry, laying the extension wires (it must be taped up nicely if not people will trip and fall), if the PowerHouse section is filled where I should be sitting, setting up the area, etc. Seriously, all these will not come into my mind. Chorus Board really can trained people to move into spirit of excellance, and I believe that's the DNA of City Harvest Church.

Had a great time today with my ex team over at Bishan BBQ-ing. The condo there is super nice and beautiful, look like a palace. Haha.. Kelvyn shared about his vision in this ministry and it was really good. Really hope to grow more in this ministry and grow in the Lord. =)