:: Keep On Keeping On ::

:: See See ::

2009-10-11T00:48:00.002+08:00

I doubt anyone will be reading my blog because I have not been updating it for a long time, since August. Haha.. Well, what have I been to? Good and bad. Life seems pretty normal with such things happening, isn't?

I really hope that I will go for Water Baptism this coming November. Things have been happening and it stopped me from going. However, one thing to know is that we do not need to be perfect to go for it. If that is the requirement, none of us will be qualified to go for it. Repentance is the only requirement, which I hope that I will have a breakthrough in that area I have been struggling for 10 over years.

To passer-by: How have you been? I hope that you are still around reading my blog. Haha.. So when will you reveal your identity to me? I have a feeling that you are Louisa's friend. Haha..

:: It's been a long time ::

2009-08-10T22:17:00.000+08:00

Indeed, it has been a very long time since I touch this blog. I have lost the fervency of blogging. And have been facebooking all this while. Haha..

So how have I been? I would say, it has been a pretty bad patch that I go through. I was telling Si Hui that it was a miracle that I went for Service last Saturday, because I have made a vow that I will never come to church again after the 20th anniversary. Please don't asked me why. I am not telling. But for 3 simple reasons, it makes me stay on.

1) I feel very happy to be part of the 27,000 strong church in Singapore. During the 20th anniversary, I saw thousands and thousands of people coming together, praising and worshipping God. How awesome is this place, the gates of heaven. I wish to go, but looking at all this people, they are so hungry for God. Why would they want to come to church so early in the morning? It's the presence that draws them here. Life will be very different if a part of my life do not have God and a church.

2) I had a good time serving in Chorus Board for all 3 days in FOP. I feel great to be part of this dynamic ministry in church. =) Sometimes, I really feel like leaving this ministry, (*Not the reason that I don't want to come to church again), but because I feel that the leaders are really good and they are fun and caring. The reason why I want to leave this ministry is because I feel so small in this ministry, but den again, many people started small too. I am not saying that I want to do great things for God, of course I want, but I don't want to progress on unless I can be flow well with pastors and BVs at Side Board. I can do better. =)

3) Overnight Prayer Meeting is one of the most impact that makes me to stay on. I feel Him. He gave me the Word. He is there. He comforted me. =)

:: Air Force ::

2009-06-22T22:52:00.002+08:00

Back to the same place where I left a year ago... Memories just keep flashing back into my mind. Haha.. Good to say some familiar faces and familiar friends again. Most of us has gained weight, but one has slim alot. Haha.. Well.. Shall blog again.. =) Take care!

:: SPOOKY - DO NOT READ AT NIGHT ::

2009-06-08T23:02:00.006+08:00

My father has a factory unit somewhere along Old Woodlands Road. He bought it few years ago to put his equipments for work. It is located at a very deserted place and you could hardly see anyone around at night, except the Security Guards.

The corridors at the building gives a eerie feeling. It is bright but yet very silent. There is a abandoned building nearby that look like a school. The building is spooky if you look from afar. There is a cemetery few meters away. I can see the cemetery and it looks abandoned. However, due to some future development, the cemetery is being demolished and there are hardly any graves left now.

The guards told my father that there are spirits wandering around at night, especially at 2a.m, the cargo lift will have an unexplainable noise. This is strange because no one will use the lift at such a weird timing. When my dad put his equipments in the factory, he feels his "mao" stand. Worst still, last time the tenant beside us is in the business of making coffins. =.=

I do believe in spirits. We need not wait till for the 7th month, there are some who will wonder around. Thank God for protection. =) Till now, I still have not encounter any weird experience. Just for the strange feeling at the corridor sometimes.

:: HP Spoilt ::

2009-06-04T22:50:00.002+08:00

Handphone spoilt again. Poor HPs. All die under my hands. Haiz.. God, cast out the spirit of HP destroyer inside me.

So fast.. Going to exam tml already. I am not ready to face the challenge, but still I am gonna do it. I really appreciate Samuel and Pascale for their encouragement this few days. Not forgetting Louisa, Kelvin, Hui Shan & Yen Hwee. Haha.. I feel so loved by them. Of course, those "secret" prayer warriors who prayed for me.

It was quite fruitful to study at JW this two days. The Rivera is really beautiful at night. When I am stress, I will just stare at the water dripping. The sound of water that hit against the earth and water, a beautiful melody that clams one's heart. =)

Next week is morning PM. Will I make it? That's hard to say. I shall try, since I stay quite near to church.

:: Appreciate ::

2009-06-02T22:58:00.002+08:00

I really want to thank my friends for the encouragement that you all send me this few days. =) It really meant alot to me. It's just like "logos" and "rhema".

"logos" - I do know that people do care for me and pray for me.

"rhema" - This is more of a personal, one to one encouragement. =) It do cheers me up whenever I received SMS and I feel motivated. =)

Haha.. Of course lah, I don't want to be so thick skinned and expect all my friends to encourage me. One or two friends who SMS me makes me to be a different man. =)

Exams will be over soon! Praise God for that.

:: Randoms in point form ::

2009-05-31T20:33:00.004+08:00

01) I am having my exams at RJC and ACJC on 5th June & 10th June.

02) My brother will be enlisting on 12th June.

03) I am going for reservist on 22nd June.

04) I am on leave now till 10th June, and from 22nd June onwards.

05) I am thinking of going to CHC to study during SOT hours next week.

06) I am going to clear my loans soon! Praise God. =)

07) Congrats to Kelvin and Joseph for becoming an officer.

08) Biblestudy on Song of Solomon was great.

09) Walking from Pioneer MRT to JW is almost the same as walking from Expo MRT to Hall 1.

10) We are shifting from Hall 8 to Hall 1, but I am only affected by 2 weeks. Haha..

11) I am happy that I can go for my cousin's wedding dinner soon. I love shark fin.

12) Looking forward to see my secondary school tutor, which happen to be my cousin's friend.

13) I want to loose weight.

14) Didn't really enjoy mini-emerge, but it was still good. =)

15) I want to try a ride on the circle line, which I can when I go RJC @ Bishan next week.

16) I want to go to the Henderson Wave on a evening? Anyone want to go with me?

17) I am going to chiong my studies now.

18) So I shall blog again when I am free.

19) Have a great week everyone.

20) God loves you! =)

:: Faith, Hope, Love ::

2009-05-25T00:53:00.005+08:00

Faith - This is the element that I am lacking of.

Hope - This is the element that I am clinging on to.

Love - This is the desire I want to have.

I want faith, to believe I can have my breakthroughs.

I want hope, to believe I can finished revising for my exams.

I want to love and be loved. - And I hope that one day, I can find my soul mate.

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God. . . Can I still believe that I can?

:: Accounting ::

2009-05-17T22:43:00.003+08:00

I wonder how should I do when there is so much thing to study yet I can't do it. I think I can't carrying on accounting. Do I have the "ingredient" to take it? I fail my "ang moh" in my O level. In my future career, I need to write a report. =.= I think the people who read it will laugh their head off.

I was sharing with my colleague and she agree that our generation have this problem. We go through primary, secondary school system. After we finished our "O" levels, we have to make a decision, because what we study will affect us in our career. Many people are stuck, and they don't know where should we go. Many courses seems fine to us, but what should we really take? There are so many things to choose, what should we really choose? Choosing the one that you like doesn't mean that you do the course in future. Like engineering? I can said that many engineering diplomas didn't choose to be an engineers in the end. I feel that its a boring course, many things to learnt, programing, etc. What's the fun about it? Well, I don't know why I choose that.

I feel that school should play a part in counseling the youths of what they really want to choose after their O levels. Although youths play a part in the decision making, at least the school do their part in creating the future talents in the next generation. Maybe, instead of conducting CCAs, they should take out some part of the time to have the students to visit work shops in poly, seeing what courses interest them, attending lessons with the kor kor and jie jie to see if its interesting anot.

Since I choose accounting, I will follow all the way. =) (Forceful smile)

:: Service 4 ::

2009-05-17T17:33:00.002+08:00

Service 4 with Dr. Kim was great. Haha.. I love her because she is a very cheerful and her preaching bring joy to others. =) Together with her husband, they built the world's largest church with abt 780,000 members in the Kingdom of God. *Actually more than that because they gave away members under their satellite churches in South Korea.

Was serving just now and it was great. =) Can I say that I took the same lift with Toro(Energy's boyband) and with Ps. Chee Kiang few hours ago? Haha.. Once in a life time experience. =D But hor.. Toro's hair not so nice leh.. Should cut post BMT hair style, short, nice, tidy and smart. Haha.. His testimony was good, and I hope that Taiwan will keep shinning for Jesus! =)

Next week is Mike Connell! So excited for his Service, because there is so much devil in my body like the sand on the sea shore and like the stars in the sky. =P I wish that I can be set free in his Service. =)

:: Greetings! ::

2009-05-13T22:19:00.002+08:00

Work is good. There are new guys joining the company recently and I feel glad, because I have more people to chit chat with now. Haha.. They are from NTU and NUS, doing their intern for three months. =)

I am getting more and more stress as exams are drawing near. Sometimes, I just wish that I could have the good memory and the energy to study. However, I can't. I have no more strength to study after work. Therefore, the best time to study is weekends. That's why I decided to go to JW Services for a month. I feel that it will save more time and I would have the energy to concentrate on my studies more. =)

God.. Would You give me more strength please?

(I was feel left out when I see the photos that you guys take. Although I may not be there, but you never include me inside the celebration. However, that's not the thing I am sad about, the thing I feel disappointed is that you never asked me to send you the wishes, and that's the least you could, but you did not.)

:: Nothing ::

2009-05-03T01:03:00.003+08:00

Nothing. I have nothing to say. I guess, maybe I am just being demanding or having a higher expectation of people. Well, I guess I should lower down my expectation and just continue to live what I just to have. Meanwhile, I will just pretend that nothing has happen from the beginning. Hopefully, just one day I will find the special someone.

"Until we have learn to love one another, we will not reach the promised land." - This is written on the MSN by one of my friend who is a malay. Amazing statement. =)

I will stop using internet for some period unless necessary till my exams are over. So much things to learn and so little time. Hoping to find a study mate.

:: Money Not Enough, Salvation For It? ::

2009-05-01T15:53:00.002+08:00

Money is not enough. For me, although I have started working, but I have not receive the pay yet, therefore I am quite tight in my finances. I just think of a crazy solution. An altar call for money. Haha.. =D

I will lay down the cash(many many $2, $5, $10 notes) on my bed. I will then preach to them, saying how valuable they are to the mankind, helping them to meet their needs and fulfilling their destiny in life, praising them for their good works they have done. However, due to the bad economic crisis, it is very important not to spend on unneccessary items. I will then tell them to be careful of their masters in their life.

After which, I will give an altar call to them, and then I will see if any notes want to be saved. I will take them along with me, lead them into a prayer, and put them in a bank. LOL.. =P My money shall be saved! =)

:: Visit from Germany ::

2009-04-27T22:12:00.003+08:00

Lunch was provided by the company today as my CEO's boss from Germany came to our office today. It was quite high class, not like the normal buffet that was served in the occasional function. I mean, I love normal buffet food too, but today's one I would rate 4 stars out of 5. =)

I helped myself with the desert - Cheng Teng quite a lot of times. Haha.. It was very nice and sweet. =) Hmm.. However, I can't really find anyone to talk to. Haha.. So I was like walking here and there. Haha.. I did talk to a few people, but was not engaging into it. There are only 3 guys in my department. One is the CEO, another is his chauffeur, and the other one is me. Haha.. So, it could be bored sometimes. Haha.. But I am still going on fine in this company. =) Sometimes I wish that there will be more young guys to talk to in the organization. Haha.. The rest of the departments guys are mostly not young adults like me.. So, we didn't have much to talk to. Haha..

Talking to girls can be quite challenging. Erhem... Is like how? Can I say, "Angela, your bag is so nice, where did it you from?" or "Karen, your top is nice, how much you buy arh?" Haha.. That will be strange right? Talking about company during break? Hmm.. Okay loh.. But I guess some people might want to focus on more relax stuff than work instead. Haha.. Relationship issues? Quite a touchy topic. So what else can talk about? I really don't know leh. Hahaha..

Sometimes, it could be an advantage to be a "flowery prince", so that talking to girls is not a problem. =) Haha.. May the rest of my one year in this company be a smooth sailing and more young guys to join this company.

:: Being an "eunuch" in the marketplace ::

2009-04-23T23:12:00.005+08:00

I got to admit that the entry title is over exaggerated. Haha.. Why do I say myself as an eunuch? Well, because I am serving my boss in my department, just like how the ancient eunuch serve their queen in the China history. Haha.. Well, but I am happily serving her because I like her as my boss. Buying food for her, helping her in some admin stuff, etc. BUT, I am still a 100% man with no defects in my body structure, just except that my height is shorter than average guys by a few cm. LOL.. I may look like 100% man, but deep inside me I got to say that there's a large percentage of childishness inside.

I am not under her direct supervision, she is my boss's boss. Maybe, it will be too quick for me to conclude that the queen is a nice person, because I just joined this company not for long and there may be some things that I have not discovered. So.. While I find her still nice, I will continue to serve her as I can. Moreover, she's the one who gave me the job, and I should "serve" her while I can. Even if I were to discover the ugly side of her one day, I will still(try) to work with her. Where can I find such a good paying job in the midst of economic crisis? For now, I can say that I am not working for the sake of money, although I need it, because I like to do the boring mundane office job. Haha..

One thing I like most about my workplace is that I can see the ongoing construction of IR, along with Singapore Flyer and the sea. I do not have the privilege to sit beside that view, but I will go inside the meeting room and enjoy the scenery when its empty.

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I just wanna to thank passerby and Pascale for encouraging me. Both of you have encourage me to go on, and not to stop. Really appreciated! Thanks.. =) Gonna study soon.. :-)

:: God is good ::

2009-04-19T01:53:00.005+08:00

God has been indeed very good to me. I have been searching for job for a very long time. All this while, I have been taking short part time jobs and the income isn't very much for me. Sometimes, I have to borrow money from my family members because I do not have enough finances.

I am working as a QC somewhere at Jurong East area. The pay isn't very attractive but yet I still want to go to work. I am quite tight at the time because the basic needs of my life are not meet. And yepx, so I decided to work. However, I told my supervisor that I wanted to leave earlier, because I want to focus on my studies more. (I was so stress that I don't know how to start and where to start my studies) I planned to work till Thursday(the day before Good Friday) because that amount I would have enough to fulfill at least 70 - 80% of my building fund. However, she didn't give me a second chance, and she say I might as well just leave. I dismiss the thoughts, but I received the call from the boss - I am fired!

When God close a door, He will opened up another day. The very same say itself, I received a phone call from my ex-supervisor, and she offered me a job! I was so happy that I couldn't believe it in my ears. I shared with Samuel, because the day before, he pray for me. He is one of the guys beside Kelvin and Derek that really care for me. Haha.. And... I was rejoicing!

When God bless people, He doesn't just bless you with a small amount, but a BIG amount! I calculated and I found out that my income has increase by at least 70%! What's more, the pay that I received is much higher than diploma holders and I do not have any experience at all! In this economic crisis, I am still able to find one! My company is also expanding! Haha.. They offered me a one year contract and what's more it comes with a 14 days of leave and 14 days of MCs! God is indeed good.. =)

My supervisor is also willing to let me go and study for my exams. Haha.. So nice right? What's more the things that I do is also somehow related to what I study in school.. =) I was indeed happy and proud to say that God is a really wonderful God. The God I know, is faithful and true!

During this period of my financial crisis, I would like to thank a few people who have help me through.

Sharon - Thanks for offering me a job in church office and praying for me. Really appreciated! =)

Louisa - Thanks for blessing me a Ez-link card! Really appreciated! =)

Derek - Thanks for blessing me food at times. =)

Samuel - Thanks for praying for my finances. You are such a nice person. =)

Kelvin - Thanks for always showing concern and praying for my work and studies. I love you! =)

Si Hui - Thanks for sharing and caring for me. =)

Pascale - Thanks for your encouragement. =)

CHCCB - Thanks everyone, especially Si Hui, Jacelyn and Meng Wei. =)

Others who have pray for me in one way or another. Thank you so much. =)

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After what you told me after Service today.. I do agree with what you say. However, I don't know how should I explain to you. I can still do when I have the time. I am not(maybe) giving up the ministry that I am called to do. However.. When things are no longer the same as the past, things will turn out to be very different. I would love to use my talents that God has given me to make others happy(hopefully for the past one year when I first started for the cycle). It would mean a sacrifice to me - my work, my studies and even my family. However, there are other areas that I can help up too. Maybe, the weakness is that the perfectness of a certain task that I will put totally into it that cause me to take up a lot of time? Just doing a simple SS, it would take me an hour to do it, believe it or not? Maybe, I am stupid? Maybe, I am not as fast as others? Maybe, because I just want to be different every week? Maybe, the 'ministry buster' is I want to be totally perfect in what I want to do? You may not understand of what I am going through. Do you know that I have a breakdown few months back? Because I have no work and money. My studies is in a mess and I don't know how and where to start. I am stress. I feel like giving up. I am not saying that I should push God aside just because I am busy. But how about those Zone Supervisors like Joanne who has step down and go into the marketplace? Surely she would still have the time for the zone? Well.. I don't know. Maybe I am just like her? I am very tired when I reached home after school. Sometimes, I would dozed off in class. Sometimes, it come to a point that it doesn't matter if I pass the exams anymore, because, I have given up.

Friends, if you were me, what will you do? I do agree that we should not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap, but if you were in my position, what will you do? I can still help out for the next event, because I guess.. I would be free by that period.. But, can I take a break for now? I don't know.

:: I fired my boss ::

2009-04-05T20:47:00.003+08:00

I fired my boss! Haha.. Hmm.. Or rather, they fired me. Haha.. Initially, I wanted to work till 30th April, but I decided to brought forward my contract till next week(the day before Good Friday). As my company is shifting to another building, they are close from Wed - Fri. Therefore, it means that I am working for four more days only. So, they decided to have a golden handshake with me. Hmm.. Abit sad lor.. Cuz I though with this job, I would be able to fulfill about 80% of my BF. Now, I can only fulfilled about 65% of my BF. Haiz..

However, I received a call from my previous company and they want to hire me. The pay is much more better than the current one. =) The good thing is a contract basis and the monthly pay is higher than the diploma graduates. Haha.. Praise God for that. But... The thing is I want to concentrate on my papers in June. Soo.. I intended to work after that. But... I am having my reservist on June 22, right after my exams. Sooo.. Which means I can only be working properly in mid-July. So should I sacrifice my studies to fulfill my BF? I don't think that is very wise. Yes.. Although I should fulfill my vow to God, but if I fail my exams, it will be very much wasted. I don't think God will want me to flung my studies just because I want to fulfill my BF. Obedience is better than sacrifice. However, building God's kingdom is also very important. Sigh.. =(

If only I am Bill Gate's son.. Haha.. Sooo... Is it also a wise decision that I break my promise to leave early? Anyway, I am also late for school because it is so hard to get a bus. So I don't think I am making a wrong decision. God O God.. What should I do?

::Happy 4th Anniversary with City Harvest Church ::

2009-03-20T11:59:00.004+08:00

20.03.05 was the first time I stepped into City Harvest Church. When I stepped into the church, I was very overwhelmed by the auditorium, and I was quite amazed of how "big" the hall is when you look from outside the building is actually not that big.

Thanks Phyllis for bringing me into church. =) When I responded to the altar call on that day, I was alone and I went down, because Phyllis's hand is on cast and she have difficulties in accompanying me to go down. Really appreciate her efforts in bringing me to church at the expense of having hand injury. I can still remembered a few of the brothers asked for my CG. I got mixed up and I tell them I am from W391. LOL. (CHC's latest CG at that time was only about 330 - 350 plus only) Haha.. They were quite puzzled and they thought I am joking. Haha..

It's a new journey for me. Making a lot of new friends in church and in CG. After Service, I went to have lunch with a few of the sisters. Pascale, Phyllis, Hui Juan, Gen was a few of them plus some others if I am not wrong. Haha.. I was like.. feeling quite uncomfortable and I thought of not coming anymore because there is just too much sisters in a CG or whatever it is called at that time when I have totally no knowledge about what is a CG. Haha.. I came again because I love the church Praise & Worship style. =) It's very happening and that's the place where I wanted to be. =)

To be honest, my first main aim of responding to the altar call was not really to be "Saved". I went down is because I don't want to receive any calls from her asking me to come to church. (That is I don't know will she anot if I don't come back again - I am still unsure, not ready.) As I have a very bad experience with MLM(I have blogged it a very long time ago) and right now, that particular CEO is under serious charges and it came out in the headlines in Jan/Feb this year. So I thought will church be like that? I was sitting at the musician terrace and I thought the ground floor portion is all those who are "high class" position, because they dressed very smartly. Haha.. BUT, on the second hand, I do believe that Jesus is the Lord and Saviour, as my friend has reached out to me when I was in Secondary 2. =) On the third hand, it is also because of some things that I shared with Phyllis before she invited me, and I tell her that I want to change. Therefore, I think it can neutralized with each other? LOL.

One thing impacted me is what my Ministry Leader, Si Hui said to us during a debrief. "It doesn't matter how you start, but it's always on how you end. People may start to do things for God with many different motives, "serve because the ministry is fun", "serve because my CGL asked me to serve in a ministry", "serve for God's blessings", "serve for others to see", etc. However, as all of us start to serve longer in the ministry, we will have ONE common purpose, we all serve is because we love God. =) So although I may respond different in a way, I believe that right now, I am NOT making a wrong choice to choose to be with God. ^^

Entry is quite long already. Shall blog more about my work in the next entry. Good night! =)

:: New Appointment, New Distraction ::

2009-03-17T16:11:00.002+08:00

The reason why I wanted to work is because I want to have $$$. Look at my size, you will know already. =.= Fatty boy.. :'( Haha.. Well, I just got a office job and it pay was $6/hour. Happy but yet sad at the same time. It's because I couldn't concentrate on my studies more now. Although I am not a hardworking boy if you were to see me at home. However, I guess this will be yet good because I might be able to fulfill my BF. =) Gonna really plan my time really well now.

:: 1985 - 2009 ::

2009-03-17T02:11:00.003+08:00

Talking about my grandma's tomb in the previous entries. Hmm.. I wonder.. How will my tomb look like in future? 1985 - 20XX. Haha.. Haiz.. When one is stress, his imagination is wild. :'( Dear God, when will I be promoted to glory?

But, I haven. . .

#1) Found my love.

#2) Fulfilled my calling and find my destiny.

#3) See my family and frenzs coming into salvation.

#4) Fly to the beautiful beaches overseas. The blue blue water and the white white sand.

#5) Fly a kite with my spouse.

#6) Receive a warmth hug from my love. (Affection is one of my needs. =D)

#7) Travel on SG flyer.

#8) Scold the person who invented many theories in business and accounting.

Hmm.. Tough choice huh? Haiz.. Live also cannot. Die also cannot. :'(

:: The Great Depression 2009 ::

2009-03-16T17:26:00.002+08:00

While the world is going through the financial crisis due to the Wall Street Meltdown in late 2008, I am going through a depression in 2009, that is why this title is called "The Great Depression 2009".

How I wish that I can have a sponge of brain where I can easily absorbed what the teacher is talking about. Unfortunately, I can't. My mind tends to react slowly but the teacher is teaching so fast. Take for a MRT train example, I am still at Boon Lay and the teacher is at Commonwealth already. It's super stress going through this stage of my life.

Not only troubled by studies, but also in other areas too. The struggles in my mind, this and that, everything. Haiz... Poor Wei Ming. How I wish that I can go to the arms of my Father in Heaven right now.

:: Randomness ::

2009-03-12T13:56:00.003+08:00

My grandma has passed away for more than 5 years and till today, I still miss her alot. Whenever I listen to the music "Sundial Dreams" by Kevin Kern, I would think of her, because the day when I bought the album is the day she passed away. Well, not all the time I listen then I will think of her, but sometimes I will.

She is not a christian, which means I might not have a chance to see her again in future. Sometimes, I would really wished that I can went a trip down to wherever she is, Sheol or wherever to pay her a visit and talk to her. I missed the nice smell on her. When I was young, I would stay at her house to sleep. I was quite a naughty and playful boy and I will always sing nursery rhymes and purposely disturb her sleeping. LOL.. I miss her making milo for me whenever I visited her. I missed the coffee that she make for me. I miss her everything.

The tomb sweeping festival is coming soon, and I have not been visiting her tomb ever since 2005 or 2006 when I come back to the Lord again. It's because my relatives will asked me to hold the joss sticks and offer prayers to her, which I can't. If I stand there and looked at her tomb, it would be very weird too. If I visit her tomb alone, that will be super weird too. CCK has such a huge area of cemetery and I will be lost in the "concrete jungle" for sure.

You know, I don't know why but I love to visit cemetery. @_@ In the past, when my family were to go and sweep the tomb, I will always be very excited to go. When I looked at the tombs, I would sometimes think how would their life be and how did they pass on. A tomb near my grandfather who passed away in 1976 shows a very young boy, probably in his teens. It showed a scout photo of his and I wondered if his cause of death is due to drowning? You know those days, boys like to play by the river after school? So probably he would have slipped and fall and drowned? Strange me huh? I also remembered when I was in Sec 2, I have a SJAB Zone Course, and one of them is to have topo at CCK Cemetery. We walked all the way up to the top of the cemetery till late afternoon, and it was so dark by the time when we reached the bottom. I can see the tombs as early as 1950s or 1960s, and it looks as if it have been abandoned because behind the tombstones, there's a paint spraying a number behind them.

Should I go this year? I really miss my grandma a lot. There's also a strange thing which till today I couldn't explain to myself, or perhaps, I am just imaging things.

After my grandma passed away, I heard a very familiar footsteps sound coming from my house kitchen. It belongs to my grandma! So I quickly stopped what I was doing(playing neopets I think) and rushed to the kitchen. Of course, I didn't see anything. But I was sure that the sound belong to my Ah Ma because of the slippers that she wore and the sound that it make. Was it really her? Or am I just too tired and missed her too much that I heard the sound wrongly? It happened in the middle of midnight and perhaps I was just really too tired. All my family members were already sleeping then. . .

Ah Ma.. I love you. .

:: Sunday ::

2009-03-08T20:14:00.008+08:00

What did I do on Sunday? I decided to take on Si Hui's suggestion, so I SMS my leader and I served today at Service 4. =) However, I didn't attend the meeting though, because I want to be a good boy at home. Haha..

Service 4 was much more better than Service 2. Haha.. Because the preaching gets better and more improvised by the last Service. Some more points were added that weren't explained yesterday. All I can say about Pastor Tan is that he is really awesome! Haha..

I am starting to love the song "Careless Whisper" and I just keep playing that song. Ever since I watched the drama of "The Different Needs of Man & Woman" of Pastor Kong preaching, I have been liking the background music of the drama, particular this song. Hmm.. I think it creates a romantic atmosphere for couples. Haha..

Hmm.. I don't know why I have this feeling I just wanna comment Pascale here for no reason. Haha.. Pascale, you are a person who never fails to be a cheerful girl and will always bring smile, laughter to people around you. Although you may feel that we teased you, because the way the you respond are pretty cute. Haha.. It doesn't mean that we love to bully you, but it's because you will bring an unexplainable joy to others, that's why we love to play with you. Not for any bullying reason, but rest assured that our intentions are not of making fun, but of love, not because we feel the thrill of bullying you, but because you are a good playmate to have. Your character is the type of girl that most guys would want to have as their future spouse. But wait, don't get the wrong idea here, I love you as a brotherly love, not of any other intention that you are suspicious of. "Watch out Pascale, your head is hitting the ceiling!!" Hahaha..

From this post onwards, I wanna try to encourage each of my CG members. Haha.. But for now, I just also wanna thank Louisa for the surprise gift yesterday. Thank you so much! You are a gift send from heaven to me. Thank you for picking me up from the darkest pit. =)

Next week is gonna be a super hectic week for me. Lessons from Tuesday to Thursday, and on Saturday and Sunday. :'(

:: Touch ::

2009-03-07T02:05:00.004+08:00

CG Sermon is very good today. Before we start praise, Sharon share about . . .

"Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat of its fruit".

- Pro 18:21

You can see that from my previous entry, what I am lacking is because...

#1) I do not have the faith in my ministry leader to trust in me.

#2) I have keep storing the hurts inside me and I did not shared it out.

#3) Therefore, it leads to an emotion explosion which my ministry leader will be wondering why I get so angry for no reason.

I am just basing on my own thoughts and feelings to judge what I did not see. Unfortunately, I choose it in a very negative thinking, thus poisoning my soul as what Sharon says. Why can't I be more positive to trust the leaders?

I am afraid. I am afraid that if I do not handle my emotions well enough, I will leave church one day. You might think that its not possible to happen, but it actually do play a part in the life of people who backslide. No church is ever perfect. You go anywhere, its the same. Just like some church hoppers, no matter how many church they hop, they still can't find a best place, because they themselves the thinking did not change.

I am not trying to say that every church is good. If you feel uncomfortable in a certain church, you can of course go another church. I have seen a video of a local church and I feel very uncomfortable. Haha.. So I will not visit that church at all. Anyway, I have decided to plant myself in CHC, so I just want to be married to the vision of this church.

Come to think of it, I do feel pretty happy in my ministry sometimes too. So why do I need to focus on the unhappy part? I am not being make use of, because I know that I am used by God, not by people. Serving at JW is out of my comfort zone, but I should served it with joy because it's not just about my needs, but also helping 2300 ++ people in Service 4. =) I shouldn't be so selfish to focus on my needs.

When I remembered of Samuel of how he will always willingly to give free Maths tuition to Louisa and Ning Zhi, I will see how selfless he is. He is willingly to teach despite he can made use of his time to go out with his friends to play, to take a sleep, but he is still willing to give his time to others. Amazing huh? =)

Compare to my previous post, does I sound a happier Wei Ming now? The things happened still the same, but if I react differently, I will see a different result. =) It's okay if I am lonely, because I already have a wonderful group of Cell Group Members. I should be contented of what I have. =)

A special thanks to Louisa for your encouragement today. Thanks for talking to me when you read my blog. You have done the correction in a right way! Haha.. I don't feel condemn at all, but I feel pretty good after listening to you. Thanks Sharon for sharing too. Your sermon always surprise me because it is always a spot-on about my life. See, that's the church that I am proud to be in. =)

However, I am still deciding to go for the meeting anot, not because I am angry at my leader for not replying my SMS nor I will feel lonely being there or it doesn't make any difference, but I just want to be a good boy at home. LOL. =P

:: Shattered ::

2009-03-06T00:08:00.010+08:00

I am serving on alternate Sundays at Jurong West Service 4. Last Sunday, I couldn't serve because I have CG. Next Sunday, I am not able to serve again because I have a class from 10a.m - 1p.m. I have told my ministry leader before that I am considering of switching ministry. If you are my ministry leader, would you think that I am telling a lie to you for not serving, I wonder?

Last Sunday when I SMS him that I couldn't serve, he didn't even reply me. So generally I would more or less feel that in his heart he might not trust me. This year I had not been able to serve for a few times due to CG and other commitments and it's just March only. Perhaps after hearing that I might want to change ministry, he may have this thoughts? Haha.. Maybe I am wrong for doubting my leader for doubting me if I am telling the truth? Haha.. Sounds chim hor?

I don't deny that I myself doubt people too, sometimes it could be even my best friend around me. So why am I having this kind of mentality too? Perhaps, I am pinning my hopes on my leaders. Maybe that's why I will have a higher expectation of them?

Si Hui give me a very good suggestion, but should I apply it? I didn't want to because I don't feel like attending the ministry meeting this Sunday. If I tell them that I want to serve this Sunday instead of next Sunday due to class, they will most probably expect me to turn up for the meeting. Another reason is because my mum has been unhappy about me going out often. (To her, going to church 2 times a week can be consider alot already. I am already jobless and I still have the cheek to go to enjoy myself? Of course she didn't say that right in front of my face, but my parents are unhappy that I do not have a proper job and always go out.) Anyway, I am just a small fly in this ministry. I enjoy serving God in this ministry, and I love to talk to the BVs, checking songs with them, flashing for them to see, etc. However, the main reason is because I feel less and less attach into this ministry. Every Sunday, I will just serve and go home. Machiam like going to work like that, and I rarely get to fellowship with the ministry peeps. It's like a generation gap although our age group is about the same or older. I have no common topics with them either.

The gathering at the beginning of this year I has already get a feel of it. When everyone is happily enjoying themselves, I will try to find people that I can talk to. Find my ex-team at Expo and then I decided to join the current JW team. Haha.. It's like I have no sense of belonging to either teams. When I borrow the lighter from my ministry last Saturday, the people over there looked at me as if I am an alien. Of course I didn't expect all of them to "Hi Wei Ming, nice to see you.. Wooo" But the people there just look at me silently, only my ex leader and one or two team members talk to me.

Anyway, whatever the meeting is, I am just interested to know the outcome, I am not interested to be there because it WILL NOT make any difference at all. I can save transportation money too. Scold me if you want, counsel me if you bother, but whatever it is for now, I don't really care. Maybe what you say might knock some sense into my head. We shall see. . .

Maybe, I desire for fellowship so much that it turn me out to be like this. When I am still serving in Expo, I didn't really have this feeling because I can get to fellowship with my members after Service. Once in awhile, the leaders will come and asked how am I doing, etc. I didn't really talk to my ministry frenzs at Expo too, but still I love being there. The culture seems to change when I serve at JW, because after serving, I will just go home most of the times, the feeling can be hurting as if I am being make used of. The leaders are not as "caring" as before, probably because he just stepped up only. When I see how each of the Cellgroup talking to each other happily at the coffee shop and I am alone and walk home, people might think I am a visitor, no sense of belonging. Haha.. Once in awhile I will saw Si Hui too, but she get along pretty well with the kids, that's why I guess she don't have this problem. Asking me to take the first step to talk? Forget about it man, as if they are interested to talk to me, so why bother?

:: Studying ::

2009-02-26T01:20:00.003+08:00

I have been searching for a best environment for me to study for this few days.

#1) My bedroom

Advantages

- Can go toilet without bothering about my notes, valuables on the table.

- Can get stuff within my reach.

- Can play music in my playlist in imeem.

Disadvantages

- My bed wants to fellowship with me and vice versa.

#2) Mac'Donalds

Advantages

- Got air-con.

- Can eat/drink as I love to eat/drink. =P

Disadvantages

- Get distracted by beautiful people easily. (Just like Pastor Kong says man driving and looking at pretty girls at the same time)

- Cannot leave my things behind when I am studying alone if I need to go toilet.

- Get tired easily.

- Tempted to spent on food/drinks when you see people buy while you study.

#3) Library

Advantages

- Quiet environment

- Got air-con

Disadvantages

- May get too comfortable till I fall asleep.

- Cannot leave my things unattended.

So where is the best place to study???? No perfect place actually.. Haha. All up to me.. =)

Going to church office to work tml for a day. =) Pretty excited about it.. Friday and next Monday I will be working at Munich Re. Haha.. Thank God for the provision. I believe there's more to come.

:: Wake Up ::

2009-02-25T01:48:00.002+08:00

It's a high time to wake up for me. Having a week break.. Wanna chiong my 3 modules which I didn't really pay attention or catch what the lecturer is teaching. Hopefully I can study till the same pace as what my lecturer stop. No time to waste.

The last batch of ACCA results just came out, and the results was rather disappointing. For the module F5, the global passing rate is only 50% and for the module F8 is about 30% passes. =.= Am I starting to regret to choose this school? Haha.. Well, since I started the race, I might as well as finished it strong. =) I can decide if I want to do well in life anot, is entirely up to me.

I am really amazed of how Pastor Kong can really spent his time replying messages to people in facebook, twitter, emails, etc. He's really a busy man and yet he can still have the time to do this simple things. I feel very bless to be in CHC, pastor by him. Sharon always say that we have been coming to one of the best church in Singapore, and I totally agree to her of what she has says. =) Although CHC might not be a perfect church, but this is where it bring changes to my life. Meeting a group of wonderful CGM and friends. Above all, this is the church of the living God, a church where by its makes you feel home and love. =)

My agent just call me today and asked me if I am interested in an admin job which last till August, and it pays $6.50/hour. Well, I agreed, I couldn't asked for more. Haha.. Maybe one of their staff signed up for SOT which last till August and that's why they are hiring? Haha.. Hopefully I am shortlisted for the job. =)

Talking above the differences of the top 5 needs of man & woman in church, I am really excited and looking forward to the last 2 points this weekend. =) However, this also come to let me know that its not just about knowing the needs of man and woman, but how about God? I remembered Pastor Tan shared in one of the services before, that the only need of God is that He will want to fellowship with His children.

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.

- John 3:16

God love us and He desire to fellowship with us. Have I meet His needs? Sadly to say.. No.. In fact, this few days I have been pretty spoilt.. My mind is full of nonsense, and I am often tempted. I almost give up sometimes, thinking that its impossible for me to breakthrough the area I am struggling in. It's like.. "No medicine can cure me that kind already". I know where is the medicine, but I am just too comfortable of where I am. The prescription of the medicine is the bible, it's just like what the doctor will write on the paper. God has written His prescription in the bible. So what's the medicine does? It will renew our mind day by day, slowly by surely. More good inputs than the bad inputs in my mind, a refreshing bath to our soul, opening up our spiritual eyes to the things unseen.

Well.. There I go again.. Always talk alot, but no action and back to the same shape again. Time to wake up, NAT!!

:: Randomness ::

2009-02-20T01:51:00.003+08:00

I am desperately looking for a job! I am in need of money. Thank God for the GST package that's coming in on the 01.03.09. However, I can't survive much on that. Sometimes it's just so hard to ask money from my family members.

It's like "Come on, 24 years old already, got hands and legs, can go and work and earn money". Should I really go and work in the F&B industry despite the fact that I may have to sacrifice my church and weekends? Sometimes, going to Expo for Service is a struggle for me, because there's insufficient value in my ez-link card, and I have no choice but to borrow from my sister. Sometimes, my sister might not even have the amount at all, and I just barely make it, praying that my dad will just bless me with $50.

Should I or should I not? My parents are rather unhappy with me already. Haiz.. Stupid me.. Should have study harder in Sec School.. Den go to Business Sch in SP, den no need take engineering liao.. God, show me a way, will you?

I always say I have the urge to really work in F&B industry because the demand is always there, but somehow.. I stopped. I remembered how difficult it was when I work in Seoul Garden during my poly days. My supervisor will always find faults with me and will always asked me not to go church(CHC), and he will always bully me, and it was a horrible working experience that I decided to quit. There was once that he scolded me till I cried during work, all because I topped up the vegetables slowly. When he asked me to do task A, after awhile, he asked me to do task B. When I do task B, he scolded me and said why I never do task A. Even my colleagues can tell that he is making fun of me and bullying me. How I wished that I could have the courage to just give him a tight slap and walk out of the workplace. Anyway, I don't really care about him le, that's 4 years ago...

Maybe what I said might surprise some of you? Haha.. Different people will react differently. Some think no action, like me. Haha.. However, come to think of it, is that really a heavenly working place on Earth? Maybe, maybe not. So should I be so picky during this bad economic times? Should I just bear all the scoldings from any supervisors if I were to come across any stupid managers? Of course, not all employers are bad, some employees are bad themself too.. Life's like that I suppose.

I really really hope that the 3 resumes that I send out just now will have positive feedbacks. God.. Show me how to live. . . . . . .

:: Ministry ::

2009-02-15T19:07:00.004+08:00

Never ever under estimate the every single small details! It's the big mistake I made today at Jurong West and it can be avoided! *Someone spanked me please!!!

Before Service 4 start, I was checking songs with Brother Poh. He checked and it was in correct order. Den he told me that the sequence was the same for yesterday(Service 1). I told him that I didn't have it and thus he wrote for me the sequence. However, it did changed abit but I didn't update my team mates eight storeys above.

Anyway, it ended up the congregation to sing wrongly. (A big sorry to those who attended Service 4!) They sang the chorus(because the LED is showing the chorus - input from 4th storey) because I didn't tell them that Poh will be singing the second verse! Haiz. . . . . What's wrong with me recently? Always didn't get the things right.

Hopefully... This is the great lesson learnt. Every SINGLE little details do play an important role to run a service smoothly. This is what I have done, a mistake that can be avoided, but I choose to ignore it and thinking that it isn't important.

Overall.. Service is still good. Thank God for that. =)

Chorus Board will be having a huge huge change in the history of CHC. Haha.. I make it sounds very kua zhang right? Haha.. We could be changing our ministry name by this year. Why are we call Chorus Board? This is because we are using a Board during Hollywood days. However, with the graphics and new stuff introduce into this ministry, we will be changing our name, to move on with technology. This is also to let the church know more about our ministry. You can just ask anyone in the church, they might not know what is Chorus Board doing. Haha..

Some changes also include changing of teams. JW will only have 2 teams in future, meaning to say we might be serving both Sat and Sunday on alternate weeks. Also meaning to say that I can't attend Service with W421 for alternate weeks. But, nothing is ever confirm yet. I might go over to Expo? I am not sure..

One of the leaders will also be going to Taiwan at the end of this year. I think she is migrating over there. Pascale, you wanna join her? Haha.. She is an actor, and has acted in a few of shows and play, but not a full time actor. She's a pretty and gorgeous lady. I think she's going over there to pursue her dreams in the entertainment industries. Hopefully she can succeed and make a name for herself there. =) Jia You!! (Or she may be just wanting to have a change in environment? I am not sure)

So... I attended a Water Baptism class today. It was good. =) Still looking through potential names for me. Meaning of my name to be "Creative, love by God & Happy man". =)

:: Updates (2) ::

2009-02-13T02:17:00.005+08:00

Recently.. I have found myself especially liking someone that I knew for about a month. Haha.. But well, its a no no. . . Because of a prayer that I made to God two days ago.

This stage that I am going through is call One Sided love. Haha.. Is love important to me? Yes, of course. I long to find one partner to share my everything, but I am not ready. I am too childish, I do not have a stable financial income either. So why bother to find? Haha. . . Sometimes, thoughts of marriage just came into my mind. If I get married in future, I will find it weird to share bed with my partner, because I am too comfortable sleeping alone. Maybe I will kick the person out of the bed when I am sleeping? I also can't imagine myself being naked to a person who is of the opposite sex. It's like "xiu xiu". Haha.. =P Wei Ming, that's too early to think of such things!!!

I was wondering. . . If I never stepped into church four years ago, what would my life be like? I can imagine that my life will be pretty messed up. Maybe I will enjoy myself even more, but I think that this happiness doesn't last forever. The world cannot give the love which God will give. Although some people were to find something they really love, but will the love last?

Why come to church, some people might asked? I have a poly christian classmate who doesn't go to church and told me that as long as he have God in his heart, make prayer every night, it will be good enough for him already. To see pretty girls, some of my friends will asked. What's your motive for coming to church? My motive? Sometimes. . . It could be just a routine to me, every Fri go CG, every Sat go Service. It can get so routine that I would forget the purpose of coming to church is to experience God, to grow in the Lord, to anticipate what God will be doing in our church.

Why do people need to go church? I believe that people should go to church because this is the place where people gather together to experience God, the love of the believers, positive influence, to increase in their knowledge of the Word of God - as different believers all have different gifts, the gift of the Pastors and CGL will benefit the believers, to also help out and to serve God with our gift and talents in the church - so that we will not be clueless what we can do when we go to heaven.

Sometimes. . . I might be too tempted to slight to the world to enjoy. But, I pray that I will know of the decision that I pray to God. Not easy, but I am gonna try.

P.S: I got a date this Valentine's Day! Hehe.. (To attend a school talk at a hotel(Erhem.. ) with my friend) =P I hope that my friend will ask me out of a meal or a movie! *Shy. . . Hehe...*

:: Updates ::

2009-02-08T04:49:00.002+08:00

So long never blog le. Too lazy to do so. Haha.. Anyway, recently I have been addicted to "Pet Society" in Facebook! It's just so so fun! Haha.. I love this game because you can get to decorated your Pet's house as if you are designing your own homes, and you can also get to earn the coins at the same time. Haha.. Well, I don't really care if people were to say I am a kid or what, so old already still play that kind of game. Haha.. =)

I have the thoughts of going for Water Baptism this coming Feb.. That's about 20 more days!! Oh man.. I can't believe its happening so fast! When Pastor Kong read to us the church events in early Jan.. I though it will still be so far away, but the TIME is now! Haha.. I don't have any white shirts and pants! =( And. . . . Well, I will want to pray more about it first ba. What name should I have? Or should I ask Sharon to help me? I have no preference of any English names. Maybe Wayne, cuz it sounds very Wei Ming. Haha.. =P

Pastor Kong is so so funny today with Pastor Tan!! Haha.. I also saw 3 female TV actresses! They are just so pretty! Hahaa.. How I wish that I can shake hands with them. =) I also saw a couple who are judges from a Channel 8 variety show, "3 Dishes 1 Soup". Haha.. So cool!! I was telling Glenn that I won't get tired to see the celebrities talking to Pastors!

Hospitality ministry needs people, and I am thinking if I want to go over. I love my current ministry very much, and I am stuck in a decision to go or not to go. Quite a hard decision for me to make, but I guess soon I will come out with an answer. Maybe, when Chorus Board @ JW have more people I will go over to HM. However, Meng Wei says that there will be a huge change in Chorus Board in Feb, and I wonder what's that? Will I go back to Expo to serve? It remains a mystery.

Valentine's Day is coming up! I want to find a part-time partner for a show only! Hahaha.. Any interested party? =P You can call me at 9_ _ 4_ _ _ 0! Haha.. =P

:: Update ::

2009-01-25T07:02:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, things are just too much for me to bear that I wish that I can sleep peacefully six feet underground. God, strengthen me, mould me and I believe that one day I can tell you with joy, "God, I have overcome it. Thank You"

The God I know,

Strengthens the weak.

HaPpy ChiNeSe NeW yEaR to aLL my frienDs!

:: Ministered ::

2009-01-21T04:06:00.003+08:00

When I read Andrew's blog on "Random", I was being ministered by what he said. The way that he blogged never fail to surprise me sometimes. There's just something special about this guy.

Whenever he blogged, he did not showed off how great he know about God and the Word. Whenever I read his entries, I will feel ministered, I will feel that I am "eating and drinking" spiritually. His entries are simple and yet it carries an anointing to bless others, to build up other believers in the Kingdom Of God. Sometimes the entries that he wrote may provoked you, but yet he does not tear your spirit apart. He may be harsh, but yet he can managed to minister to a stubborn person like me.

His relationship with God are not just merely God as his Lord and Saviour, not only a Father, not only a friend, but a very close friend, like an intimate couple. =)

I am really glad and bless to have a frenz, a brother in Christ like him. =) May God use this strong man to continue to be a blessings to others in the Kingdom of God.

http://androne.blogspot.com

:: Wish to be alone ::

2009-01-20T03:28:00.003+08:00

Sometimes. . . I feel that I am a strange guy. When I wish to be alone, I would wish people to talk to me. When people talk to me, I will not want to talk to them. Now, I am going through this stage. . . Weird me. . .

Chinese New Year is just ard the corner, however, I do not really look forward to it. The only thing I look forward to CNY is to get Ang Baos. Haha.. I love the season more during the Pre-CNY where I get to clean the house, getting excited with the shopping of goods and during the eve Reunion Dinner. As soon as the clock hits the CNY Day 1, I will look forward for the next year Pre-CNY again. Another weird point of me. =.=

2009 is the year of cow, and its "my year", and which means I am 24 this year. 12 years ago(The year of cow), I am taking PSLE! Haha.. If I can and if there's a chance, I will wish to go back to retake my PSLE, studying harder, going to Express stream and going into JC.

If another 12 years were to pass by again, I will be in my mid-thirties le. Gosh.. So old, where will I be I wonder? What house will I get to stay in? Will I be married? How many kids will I have?

Thanks for your SMS Pascale. =) Really appreciate that you are not just a listener who listen and forget, but a listener who listen and encourage. ^^

:: Nothing ::

2009-01-20T01:08:00.003+08:00

I wish that . . . . . . . .

:: Lost ::

2009-01-19T00:57:00.000+08:00

:: First CG of 2009 ::

2009-01-17T00:56:00.003+08:00

The first CG of the year. One word to describe - Awesome! I believed that great things are going to happened this year for W421 as we began to tithe the first 15 minutes to God by praying in the spirit. Sharon begin to speak, and asked us to visualize the areas of our life that we want to see a breakthrough in. I see my family staying happily together. I see good results that I will get in my school.

The sermon was very good. I felt that it was for me. Before I came to CG, my mind was wondering elsewhere, I feel lost, I feel like straying away from God, I feel like doing some things that God will not be pleased of, I feel that I feel unloved by people.

To me, love is like an oxygen to me. However, I have always get the wrong source of oxygen. I did not think of the main source of oxygen - Love from God. When I feel unloved by my friends, to me, it's like the world coming to an end, and I have been trapping in the world, because I have been blinded and I have failed to see God's love.

Open up my eyes to the things unseen,

Show me how to love, like you have love me.

Praying by the ten commandments is really powerful. =) The message not only talks about teaching us the right way to pray, but the hidden message behind it, the little details reveal to me that I have been wrong all the while. The little details reveal to me that God wants me to put Him as my main source. =)

Well, I can easily talk about this. However, its another thing to live it, and another thing to last it, not just for a few days or weeks, but being a footprint in our heart. I may talked about this, but few months down the road, the same thing might happen again.

However, thinking of that issue again. I will think, "What route should I choose?"

:: I Wish I Wish I Wish ::

2009-01-14T02:35:00.004+08:00

I NEED FINANCIAL BREAKTHROUGH!

(If only heaven could rain down money on earth, how great will it be, but I know, this is just my dreams.)

Dreams are my reality.

The only kind of reality.

I dream of loving in the night.

And loving seems alright.

Although it's only fantasy.

If only such dreams can be a reality. . . Now, open up your mind and imagine. . .

- Millions of $1000 notes falling down in the CBD area.

- People snatching and catching the fallen notes.

- People who have caught a great harvest of notes return to the office and start firing their bossy boss.

- The bosses are speechless.

- Second day, the same thing happen again.

- This time round, the boss start to catch the fallen notes.

- However, will their harvest be as great as their previous workers?

- NO! It's because the workers are always working hard and the bosses are always ordering the workers around.

- Therefore, the bosses can only suck their thumb and return to their office with a few notes.

- All the workers decided to left because they have a great catch.

- The workers leave the office and they live happily ever after.

- The poor bosses live sadly ever after.

THE END

Haha.. I wonder if I can be a script writer? Maybe I can write dramas as great as "The Little Nonya" and movies as great as "Titanic"? Haha.. So thick-skinned me. =P

In heaven one day. . .

God: "SW Tan, so where's the 2000 dramas and 500 movies that you have written?"

Me: "God, this are the accounts that I have audit on earth. Would you show the heaven's balance sheet? So that I can help out in the accounts as well."

God: ". . . "

Haha.. I was just wondering, God is a God of infinity. His riches are uncountable. I wonder the accountants in heaven need many digit of calculator. Hahaha.. A huge calculator in the middle of heaven. Maybe just by pressing one amount will take 5 years. Hahaa.. Well, I hope that one day I can find out what's my calling that God has written for me. ^^

As you can see, I am getting abit crazy here and there. Hopefully, I won't end up like Yu Zhu being tied up in the hospital. . .

:: School Life ::

2009-01-09T01:31:00.002+08:00

I have not been studying since March 2006, except for Bible Studies. So how's school life to me? First day was good. Second day was okay. Third day was below average. :'( I don't understand what cher talking. (Can't use singlish? Okay.. Let me rephrase) I don't understand what the lecturer is teaching. :'( I think I will need a interpretation headset. Wonder if my school provides it?

The lecturers also asked us to read newspaper, to read about the happenings around the world. Hmm.. Too bad, I only have the habit of reading chinese newspaper, and the teacher today asked us not to read them. This wife of mine very picky. Ms Accounting, I never knew that you are such a complicated person! Are you a "les"?? If you are, den I am a "more"! Hahaha.. No lah, just kidding with you. Ms Accounting, since I choose you, I will follow you, because I believe in my vision. Haha.. Ms Accounting, I think your name very long leh.. I think I give you a new name. Hmm.. Take after my surname ba, Mrs Tan. ^^

Mrs Tan, I wonder if I have enough time for you in the future. I have to work, perhaps you will not feel the love from me. How can I show my love to you? By hugging you to bed every night? By having quality time with you? What's your love language so that I can show my love to you better? =) Mrs Tan, would you please lend me your ears by coming closer to me? Mr Tan just whispered into Mrs Tan ears: "Nothing in this world can take me away from you, our love goes on and on" (HUgx) ^^

:: Eve Before My Marriage ::

2009-01-05T22:09:00.005+08:00

Surprise? Yeah.. I am getting married tml! WOoHOo!! Been waiting for this day for so long. I have not tell anyone about who am I getting married to, only some know. Shhh!! Dun tell them, wait they will give me a face if I never invite them to my wedding. No choice, times are bad. I can't afford to hold many tables in the hotel and I can't possibly hold it in a coffee shop.

I first knew the person in August. When this person caught my attention, it just drew all my spirit away from me. I was totally captivated by this gorgeous person. Man. . . I am the luckiest guy on Earth. Though I may be poor, but Pastor Kong says "You may be poor today, but if you follow God, you will not be poor all your life" Haha. . . Yeah, and I believe that it will come to pass. =)

During the first night of Asia Conference, I slipped away after my afternoon elective to meet this person without my members knowing. I went to Somerset and meet my love. I knee down my knees in front of CentrePoint. I ignore the stares from the passer-bys, as if I owned the whole street without any fear. I gave the person my heart and I propose to her, and the reply was "Yes!"

A week later, we went down to ROM to register our marriage. I was late to meet and I even cabbed down! Cost me $20. =( However, to meet my love, I won't mind even sacrificing my life. Haha. . .

Tml is my big night, 06/01/09. Go and buy 4D! 0601! Haha.. No lah. Dun ok? =) Anyway, it will be a night that will marked down inside my heart for the next 50 years on Earth with my lovely wife. She promised me that she will give me half dozen of children. Just like my family, 3 boys and 3 girls. Hopefully, I have twins. =)

Now, I shall introduce formally my wife for all of you, and her name is . . . . . . . . . . . .ACCOUNTING!

Hahaha. . . Dun throw things at me! Ouch... Ouch!! Stopped pls! Opss!! Ouch!! :'( Okok.. Dun crap le.. =P

Haha.. Why do I say marriage? It's because I will be spending my life with accounting for the next phase of my life. I have no knowledge about accounting at all, and once I start to let it flow inside my life tml night, it will become part of my life. No matter I hate it or love it in the end, it will still be inside my memory. =) So, I will want to love accounting with all of my heart, I don't know if I can, but I promise that I will try.

Why do I say some of the events above? Let me explain. =)

- August is the period where I get to know ACCA.

- First night of Asia Conference is where I attend the talk, and I like it.

- A week later is when I went down to register, and YES, I took a cab to Orchard!

Hopefully I can do well in school. Last chance for me, because I fail to do so in my primary all the way till poly. Last chance to study, last chance in school, last chance in my life. ^^ Jia You Wei Ming!!

Sometimes, I am really glad that there's an angel in my CG, and yes, that's non-other than Louisa. I am really glad to receive encouragement from her, and I believe that the other members will feel the same way too. Really thank God for such a wonderful person in my life. =) Jia You Louisa! I believe that God has see what you have sown and I believe that you will reap with joy! ^^

:: The Journey To 2009 ::

2009-01-03T02:08:00.004+08:00

31/12/2008, Wednesday

After my work end, I took a walk ard Raffles Place for a sight-seeing, before I say goodbye to my workplace. It was really a beautiful sight. =) However, I was quite tired physically and I dun know where can I sleep, and I was wondering if I could just hide inside the toilet cubicle for a short nap. LOL.. I didn't of course. Haha.. After which, I meet up with Samuel, Terence, Derek at Junction 8 for a walk and to buy some snacks. Pascale joined us after that and we have some dessert. It was really delicious! Haha.. Thanks Terence and Derek. =)

After which, we walk to Tong's house. She stays in a really beautiful house and I had fun with the Ex-Zone members playing ard. We played Werewolf and it was really fun! Haha.. Had a great time talking to Aaron and Kelvin, and both of them are just so funny.

Wei Ming: So when will you be going to Taiwan?

Kelvin: Should be ard 10th April.

Wei Ming: Wah.. I think tat's very near Easter.

Kelvin: Ya.. I think so too.. How ah? I am gonna to miss the drama.

Aaron: Haha.. Den you just remember Easter and your days in Taiwan will be shorten.

Kelvin: Haha.. Yeah. I just imagine myself as Jesus carrying the Cross(Kelvin's fieldpack) and walk the 72km. Looks very alike hor? Haha..

(Aaron pretend to hold a whip and he began to whip Kelvin and he started singing the Easter song where Jesus get whip. "They shouted crucify. . . ." Kelvin was pretending to ouch here and there)

What a funny combo of brothers. LOL..

Soon.. We all gather for a countdown and we hold the sparkles! Thanks to Kelvin and Catherine for the contribution. Haha.. A joy to spent time with them in the very first moment of 2009!

01/01/09, Thursday

I spent most of the time fellowshiping with my bed. My best buddy of 2009! Cuz I'm really sleepy as I have lack of sleep. Called Kelvin and SMS Joseph before they flew off. Haha.. Look forward for both of you to come back.

02/01/09, Friday

Last day of work in Munich Re. Really miss working with them. They took care of me very much. Some treated me like a son, and some joked that I can be their son-in-law. Haha.. I think I am not really to be any relationship with in-laws, cuz I never take law as a degree. Haha.. Miss you guys!

Chorus Board dinner at CHIJMES. It was fun. Haha.. I didn't talk much as it was quite a big gathering from both JW and Expo, and there were alot of unfamiliar faces. Really hope to know all more. =)

03/01/09, Saturday

Serve at JW Service 1. This Service rocks man. Haha.. I couldn't go for Expo Service cuz I wanna cook for my mum as it's her birthday today. Happy Birthday Ma Ma! All dish that I cook are okok, except for the chicken wings, it's not cook properly. Haha.. I also realised that I use the wrong flour to fry. Haha.. No wonder it's not crispy enough. =P

Starting school soon! Really hope that I can do well in this school. =)

:: Goodbye 2008 ::

2008-12-31T02:09:00.003+08:00

Goodbye 2008! When will I ever see you again? I shall miss you! :'(

This year, I am quite happy of what I have become in 2008. I have achieved certain things which I have never dream of in the beginning of this year. Have I fulfill the goals that I have set this year? I would say only 20% are fulfilled. Haha. . . However, what's the point of crying and regreting not able to achieve it? It's time to move on . . .

However, 2008 has left somethings that I wanna thank God for. . . ^^

#1) God: You see me through all the obstacles that I went through. You lift me up when I fall down. You showed me that You are the only source where I can turn to. You are my hero. You gave me the talents in giving me ideas to do birthday cards in 2008. I have never imagine that I can do the cards that some might have touch the member's hearts. Although I very much wanted to give up and not doing anymore cards in 2009 because of some issues, You spoke to me through the testimony of Sun and LiLian during Christmas. I will used what You have given to me and to bless the members. Although there are obstacles that came along the way, I will surely find ways to do it. =)

#2) W421: Thank you guys so much for being a wonderful group of friends! I would like to thank specially Sharon, Wei Jian, Pascale, Louisa, Si Hui, Kelvin and Derek. Thank you so much for helping me in my walk with God. The rest of the W421, I love you all too. It's really a joy to fellowship with you guys! This CG is really different and it's full of talents in each individual members! May our friendship grew up into another level in 2009!

"May we grow old together in church." - Louisa Althea

#3) Chorus Board: Thank you Kelvyn and May, my Expo team leader. Thank you for giving me a chance to go over to Jurong West to serve. It has given me much opportunity to do more in this ministry. =) Si Hui, thank you so much for being such a wonderful sister in Chorus Board. I really love talking with you as you will always pump faith into our spirit. Jacelyn, Meng Wei, Laura, Rosa, Su Ping, thank you so much for guiding me when I came over to Jurong West, to learn from the beginning before the Side Board is set up. You guys are truely a blessings in my life. =)

#4) Andrew, Shing: My fellow church mates cum faith inspiring bloggers! It's really amazing and a blessing to read your blogs. Have I ever mentioned that what you guys have blog actually touches my heart sometimes? And it is like a word for me when I need it. I pray that God will continue to use both of you in 2009 to have a greater anointing over your blogs and that it will touches the hearts of your hungry readers! May our friendships will also go up to another level as we discover each other more.

#5) MJ Zone: This is one of the best zones that I have ever been to! Although I am in JS Zone now, but I still love this ex-zone of mine very much. Sorry Jimmy, maybe JS Zone will be my best zone in 2009, but for 2008, its non-other than MJ Zone. Not purposely say because you don't let me in during the Christmas Eve Service. LOL. It's because I have only been in the new zone for 4 months, and W421 has only been with one of your zone CG for one outing, so I can't give any comments. Ming Jing, you are truely the best ZS in CHC. I love the BS lessons that you taught and I am going to miss the days of your zone camp. Although the zone activities may be too youthful, full of excitement to attend, BUT, it's the atmosphere that your zone creates really make me fall in love with the zone. There's something special about your zone in spiritual realm, and I really hope that one day I attend one of your zone activities. ^^

#6) Joseph Lim: My MJ Boon Lay friend! What an awesome opportunity to know you bro. I pray that the coming year in 2009 we will know each other better and I pray that our friendship will grow! Continue to run after the dreams of OCS that God has call you to be an officer to impact the army camps! =)

#7) AeMF/DART: My fellow Airforce buddies. Although I have disappoint you guys time and again and vice versa, but I really enjoy spending time with you all in the hangar. I miss those times when we carry out "missions" together. =) I would also like to thank my Shift I/C, SSG Koh Chuan Quan and SSG Tan Poh Kok, for sending me home when we work together in the same shift. Although you guys may be of a higher rank, but you guys never look down on the "small flies" like us. =) You guys has also help me save quite a few hundred dollars just because of the transportation fees! =)

#8) Family: How can I forget about them? My dad and my mum. I love you guys so much. Although there may be times I will argue, quarrel and lazy to do the things you guys ask me to do, but I really love you all. Thank you so much for lending me/blessing me money when I need it urgently. I know that it's quite shameful to ask/borrow money at this age, but you guys still willing to give. My siblings! Thank you so much for bringing joy into my life. Hopefully in 2009 we will understand each other better! =)

#9) Singapore Power, Munich Re: Thank you so much! Especially my new found sweet Jie Jie June(MR). I really thank God for giving me an opportunity to know you. You stay at Jurong too, hopefully one day we can meet up for coffee. Thank you Angela(MR), you are one of the nicest supervisor that I have ever meet. Thank you Grace(SP), you are such a cute aunty. Haha. . . Thanks for showing your love over me and give me a crystal, for some alert purpose. I don't know where it is now, and I don't believe in it, but I really wanna thank you for loving me. =)

#10) Wei Ming: Haha.. Of course, of all the people in the world, I should never forget about myself. =P Although sometimes I will hate you, but sometimes I will find you cute. Wei Ming, I know that it's hard for you sometimes, to go through the torment no one will understand, but let's really go through this together alright? You are not alone. I love you always and you are my best friend!

Farewell 2008 & Happy Birthday Si Hui(W421)!

:: Operation Save The World ::

2008-12-25T23:34:00.014+08:00

Chorus Boarders, TV Crew with Operation Save The World! Can you spot me?

The lovely angels of Chorus Board!

Look at my wings! Am I praying or am I flying? Haha. .

:: Christmas! ::

2008-12-25T19:24:00.005+08:00

Happy Birthday to Jesus and my sister Mei Hui! Jesus, thank You so much for being with me all this while, and seeing me through all the ups and downs I go through. Although I have let You down alot of times, but yet You stood by my side, giving chances to get up again. I love You. Happy Birthday!

Angels say: Jesus, speech! Ok??

Jesus: OKkkkk. . .

LOL.. I love "Operation Save The World". Every part of the drama, I do enjoy myself very much at Jurong West Service 6. Although I serve on Christmas Eve at Jurong, I miss most of the drama as I was checking songs with Annalbel and Kelvin, to prepare for the songs for the second Service, how the songs flow especially it was a bilingual Service. We have to know when will they be singing in Chinese and English. I though that it could watch the drama at Expo, but I was wrong, very wrong. . . .:'(

The second Service at JW was delayed, thus I requested my ministry leader if I can leave early to go Expo. She allowed and she asked Jia Bin, one of my ministry frenz to replace me. I reached Expo around 7.10p.m and that's the worst feeling that I have ever experience, because for the first time in my life attending CHC, I was being turned away for Service! How disappointing can that be?

Thousands of people were queueing up outside Hall 8, all the way to Hall 7, or even Foyer 3, I don't know, because I was stuck in between Hall 7. When my ZS, Jimmy told the crowd to leave, alot of people are very disappointed. I saw groups of families leaving, new frenzs that have come also leave. Inside my heart, I was very sad because I rushed all the way down from JW! My heart feel very sorry for the people because they could be the ones who walked down the altar call. The people leave with unhappy hearts. Even they gave us the "priority letter" to enable us to have the seats first for the next few services, but somehow, it's just very different.

Even when the people plead the ushers to let them in, saying that their bags are inside, saying that the frenzs will be flying off the next day, they die die don't let us in. Initially, I want to abused my Ministry Pass, but I don't want to, as I feel that it's not a very nice thing to do. I miss both romantic candlelight services with W421. That's so sad. . . :'(

There are still people who insisted queuing even thought we were told to leave, and I was one of them. Jimmy made a funny statement, "Hello everyone, thank you for your persistence in queing, but the hall is already 100% filled and there's no more seats for you. . . . . I am telling you the truth, and the truth shall set you free." =.! It's not CHC who don't allow us into the Hall, but they have to stick to the Expo fire safety regulations, if they exceed the capacity of crowd, they have to shut down the service. I think it's because of the candlelight Service bah, if not we can squeeze more people in. Hopefully by 2011 we can have our own building! We can have 15,000 - 18,000 ppl also no problem! Haha. . .

So during the altar call, I finally get inside to the Hall. =.! I joined my CG for fellowship. It was really a joy to spent time fellowshipping with W421. We went to Bugis MacDonald's to makan, after that, we walked to Esplanade. It was a fun time of laughter! Haha. . . Murderer was the favourite, and we never get tired of it. Haha.. I went over to Derek's house to stay over. Two man in a room having S. . . . Hmm. . . Haha.. No lah, we never do anything against the law. Haha.. Hmm.. Two man in a room having a sleep, separately. Thanks Derek, you are a very nice host to me. ^^

Thank you W421, Sharon, Pascale, Louisa, Terence and Jacelyn. =) Thanks Sharon and Pascale for trying to get me in. Thanks Louisa for your SMS, it really make feel love and not alone. Thanks Terence for trying to get me in. =) I am sorry that I have interrupted you in the midst of drama. Thank you Jacelyn for your SMS. "Just think that you have given up your seats for someone who walk down to the altar call". =)

I was serving at JW today again. Actually, I SMS my leader yesterday if I could attended the 12.30p.m Service @ Expo with my CG, but I can't because it's too late for her to find replacement. I actually wanted to go because in Expo they have the angels to fly during the drama, and I was thinking of spending time with my CG too. I decided to obey my leader and I serve. Inside my heart, I was thinking this could be the worst Christmas that I have, but it's not until . . . . . .

After giving Alison, the vocalist to sign the evaluation form(Some forms for the BVs to grade on us how we flashed the songs for them to see), I was about to take the lift to level 4 when Jacelyn, my ministry leader called me. She called me to went over to the stage so I went.

I have never visualized myself taking photos with the drama team! Haha.. What a awesome privilege! It really brighten up my Christmas just having to take photos with them, with the lovely angels that fly in Expo that I yearn to see, but now, we were as a huge team in a photo! Haha.. Indeed, God sees! Hahaa.. Thank You Jesus! =)

I also try putting on the lovely wings and it was a dream come true. I was serving and I saw the group of angels on the choir stage, and I was thinking in my mind, "How I wish that I can be one of the lovely angels" Hahaa.. Thank You Jesus, for making my dream come true! Happy Birthday! =)

:: Love ::

2008-12-17T19:49:00.005+08:00

Recently I have not been doing well spiritually, I didn't pray often and my mind was occupy by things which is not correct before God. It was like a journey to hell. I can choose to react differently, however I choose the latter. All because I was let down by someone, I feel lost, I feel disappointed, and I hurt God in the end. I blame the person in my mind, blaming him/her that I choose this path is because of what he/she do to me. I know some might say, "Why did you hurt God? God didn't make you sad what? Why must you hurt Him? It's your friend who have hurt you!"

True.. Many a times we hurt God in the end for the things He did not do. People backslide because of some unhappiness in the church, people leave church because he/she was let down by some leaders or members. But have they(including me) know that God is really innocent? He is not part of the unhappiness and argument. Why do they choose this path?

This morning when I woke up, I was reminded by a powerful word, "Love". I didn't think too much about it, and I just hurried off to work. I just thought of how and what should I do? My mind was drifting in the sky, finding some place to land. . .

I was asked to go to Ministry Of Manpower to run some errand during lunch hour today. Therefore, I didn't settle my lunch near my office. I came across this place call "Breakthrough Cafe" and I decided to settle my lunch there. When the food arrived, I notice this piece of paper on the table, and then I get to know that this cafe is special because all the workers there are ex-offenders. They were given a second chance through a christian ministry that helps them back to re-integrated back to the society, to be the salt and light in the workplace. The people there are very friendly and they served the customers with a smile.

I look around the shop as I was quite curious. I have never been to a christian cafe before. (I once work in a cafe in NUS. It played Future and Cross album by CHC but its not a christian cafe at all. Haha..) Anyway, I love the atmosphere at the Breakthrough Cafe and I took my time to enjoy the coke that I ordered.

I saw this painting on the wall, and this is what the painting says. . .

"You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself"

- Luke 10:27

I was surprised when I see this painting. Is God trying to tell me something? I believe that God is trying to speak to me about loving Him all over again. . .

From this verse alone, we can see that loving God is not just merely but what you confess or by what you say. Once we make a decision to follow Jesus and to love Him, God requires four things from us.

#1) All your heart

#2) All your soul

#3) All your strength

#4) All your mind

He wants our heart, soul, strength and our mind. Notice that God speaks about "All". All means 100%. It means everything of us. He didn't say 50% or a partial of our heart, soul, strength and mind. He wants our All.

Meaning to say that even when I am . . .

- Being disappointed or let down, He still wants All of my Heart.

- Feeling lost or don't know what to do, He still wants All of my Soul.

- Tired or having no energy to do anything, He still wants All of my Strength.

- Being occupied by the busyness of life, He still wants All of my Mind.

Let this be a test to us if we really love God. Of course, there are some other things which require to keep in our mind too. Such as keeping His commandments, etc. However, I believe that this is the basic requirements that God has for us to love Him, because of the decision we make at the altar call. =)

Special thanks to Shing who share about "A Pure Heart". Go to her link

http://shingology.blogspot.com to read more. It's really awesome! =) Some of her things that she share came to let me have this revelation too.

Hope you are bless! =) Off to do something! ;)

:: Christmas Party ::

2008-12-14T02:18:00.003+08:00

On Friday, my workplace has a Christmas party. Haha.. Well, I thought its too early to celebrate but my workplace started to have it. Haha.. The food is really good! We have food from Old Chang Kee, Delifrance, Sakae Sushi, Pizzas and they serve wine. Haha.. However, I didn't drink wine because I don't like the taste at all. Haha.. If I drink, it's just for fun for maybe I just want my body to have some benefits from the good side of wine. ^^

Basically, I am just like a office boy in this company. =) Though its sort of a low class status in the company but I love doing the job. Sometimes I would have to run errands here and there, but I don't mind. I am also the youngest in the department! Haha.. The big jie jie(sisters) address me as Ah Boy. Haha.. Feel so happy when they called me by that name. Got one lady say I don't look like 23, but some 18-19 year old boy. Haha.. I am just like Clyde in W421, youngest in the company although I am the oldest in the CG. Haha.. How I wish that I am the youngest in the CG tooo. . . ^^

I once know this group of people and I followed them to go clubbing at XXXXXXXX to celebrate one of the guy's birthday. Haha.. It's not some sex club, but I can't really remember the name le. That was in the year 2004 ba. I was the youngest in the click too. Haha.. Feel so bless in a way wor. Haha.. During that time, I didn't really enjoy myself much because I feel that the environment is very noisy. They are very generous in the music but yet they created noise pollution at the same time. They saved money on the lights and they have to use different colors of spotlight to shine here and there, instead of having a proper light to light up the whole room. LoL.. That's the view of a person who don't appreciate the value of clubbing. =P I don't think I will go to such places in future unless for any good strong reason, like supporting Glenn in his band. Haha...

I'm so excited for next week CG on Sunday. It's gonna be a great time as we celebrate Christmas. WooHooo!! Going to sleep le, serving tml at JW! =)

:: Happenings! ::

2008-12-11T23:57:00.002+08:00

On Wednesday, my siblings and I went over to Sakae Sushi for buffet at Tradehub 21. It's located under the MRT track between Jurong East and Clementi. It was a great time of laughing and laming. Haha.. Shall post photos once I have them. =)

Before we go over to Sakae Sushi, my sister and I went over to Jurong Point. It was really a huge shopping center after the extension opened!! Everyone in the new section of Jurong Point was like looking around here and there, looking at the new shops, the people at the shops were in high spirit and serving customers happily. The atmosphere in the new sector still have those very fresh furniture smell, some of the shops are still undergoing renovation. Haha.. It is a total different Jurong Point!! Once the Air-Conditioned bus interchange opened by Feb 2009, Jurong West will be the greatest place to live in in Singapore! Haha.. ^^

Here are some of the new shops in Jurong Point Extension. . .

#1) Burger King

#2) New York New York

#3) 1A Crispy Puffs

#4) Action City

#5) Mini Toons

#6) Jia Xiang Mee Village

#7) Old Town White Coffee

#8) My Party Friend

and many many more. . . =)

Started work today. My workplace is somewhere at Raffles Place, and I will be working till 2nd Jan. It's a pathetic pay of $6.50/hour. Haha.. Well, it's better than rotting away at home. At least I can earn some money to fulfill my Jan building fund, bills, etc.

The office is set at a very good location and I can get to see the still building IR, Singapore Flyer, and the sea. It's really very nice to work there wor. ^^ My supervisor is a very nice lady. =) Most of the people are very friendly and they seems happy to work there. Haha.. I came across some very high class office ladies. They were very polite and the way they speak is very professional and the way they dress is different from the way the ladies dress in my previous company. Maybe just like the land value, Raffles Place is more expensive, therefore the ladies working over at Raffles Place has a higher value too. Haha.. =P

I'm looking for a permanent job after this contract ends. Maybe I will work at Jurong Point as I saw quite a number of shops who wants to hire people. However, that means my weekends will be burn. Well, I shall see about it ba. ^^

Initially I am asked to involve in helping out in Christmas drama production. Hmm.. Not acting, not moving the stuff on stage, but displaying some of the words which the actor/actress say. Haha.. But now, no need le, cuz commitment is quite high. Nvm, hopefully in future ba. ^^

:: Viva Forever - Spice Girls ::

2008-12-09T03:10:00.009+08:00

Do you still remember

How we used to be

Feeling together, believe in whatever

My love has said to me

Both of us were dreamers

Young love in the sun

Felt like my saviour, my spirit I gave ya

We'd only just begun

Hasta Manana,

Always be mine

Viva forever, I'll be waiting

Everlasting, like the sun

Live forever, For the moment

Ever searching for the one

Yes I still remember,

Every whispered word

The touch of your skin, giving life from within

Like a love song that I'd heard

Slipping through our fingers,

Like the sands of time

Promises made, every memory saved

Has reflections in my mind

Hasta Manana,

Always be mine.

Viva forever, I'll be waiting
Everlasting, like the sun
Live forever,
For the moment
Ever searching for the one

Back where I belong now,

Was it just a dream.

Feelings unfold, they will never be sold

And the secret's safe with me

Hasta Manana,

Always be mine

Viva forever, I'll be waiting

Everlasting, like the sun

Live forever,

For the moment

Ever searching for the one

I love this song alot. This song is kind of sad but I like it. Haha.. Sometimes when I listen to songs, I didn't really pay attention to its lyrics, and I will just enjoyed the music. However, I feel that I should start to take note of the lyrics and try to feel what the singer is singing, and the meaning behind of the song.

In my personal view, I feel that this song is about two friends or a couple who used to be very close, but one of them has left, and she is singing how she remember the good times they once shared, and how is she waiting for her friend/boyfriend to come back to her, and how she wished that she can live back those happy times again, but it seems impossible, because she sings about "how we used to be", and it will be difficult to have back those times again. . .

It takes years to build up a friendship, but it can just take a second to destroy it. Your wounds on your skin may heal, but the hurts inside will remained a scar forever. That's why we have to be careful with our words when we talk to people, and how we handle the friendship well. =) Friends are hard to come by. The whole of Singapore consists of 4.8 million people, and out of the 4.8 million people, 2 or 3 people have this opportunity to meet together. Isn't that amazing? (My heart is still bleeding when I recalled certain friendships) :'( However, people are not perfect in the first place too, but some people may just take it for granted.

Haha.. So what's your view about this song? I guess different people will view differently. =)

Jurong Point Extension is opening tml! Hahaha.. Going with my siblings to go over there to walk walk.. =)

:: Random ::

2008-12-08T00:35:00.004+08:00

After Service on Sat, my CG went over to Changi Airport to fellowship. It was a great time of laughing as we celebrate Pascale and Aaron's birthday. We took alot of unglam photos and it was really funny! Haha... Hope that I can get the photos soon! We also send Cheng Xi off as he had a school trip to Philippines. I was joking with Si Hui that Cheng Xi can actually put his money at the book of Philippians to change to Philippines currency. Hahaha.. Have a great trip bro! =)

Sharon targeted our CG to multiply by Dec when we hit 20. Right now, our CG has about 17-18 members, which is gonna be happening real soon. I kind of feeling happy, yet sad. This is the most talented, most happening, most loving, most fun CG in CHC! (Haha.. I am bias) The times when we go Airport, the times when we fellowshipped at E2Max and how Louisa and I were being freaked out by the horror movie, the times when we have our steamboat at Bugis, the times when we sing KTV at a ulu place at Katong, the times when we play Murderer(the most fun though I was the most blur! Haha), the times when we chiong for seats at Hall 8 and how I am almost being tripped and fall - thank God for Security who open wide his arms to protect me, or else I will really tripped I might get stepped all over by the excited youths running behind me. Haha.. All the ups and the downs, the tears of sorrow and the tears of joy. It has marked a mark inside my heart, forever. =)

However, we have to move on in life. We cannot stay inside our comfort zone for too long. We have to move on, seeing members rising up one by one. Seeing the potential unleashed by individual members to serve in God's Kingdom. Let's grow old in church together, W421. I love you all! =)

I was asking Louisa what's friendship love, and that's the defination she gave me. . .

Love is abt loving the person with the purest love without intentions. or motives. no expectancy of reciprocation of the same amount of love back. being there when the frenz really needs us around, knowing how to give ur friend the space and freedom to pursue their other matters.

How true the statement is. That's the love which the church taught us too. Love is the desire to give at the expense of self, because love desire to give. God love us so much that He send His Son Jesus to died on the cross for ALL of us. He didn't just died for the believers, He died for ALL. Knowing that some will not love Him back and yet He is willing to die for them, that's the love of God for us. =)

I know that it's very hard for me to do it, but I will want to try to do. Sometimes, inside my heart, I will be very tired, but I will still want to try to love others. (For those who don't feel love by me, I am trying okay? Haha.. It's not that I don't want. Haha.. =P I know that I am so thick-skin, that's why pimples don't survived on my face for too long) Sometimes, I would really love people to love me the same way I treat them too. However, this is not love, it's lust. Haha. . . Well, I will try to love people the way God love people. Not easy, but I'll try. =)

Talking about this year Christmas Drama, I love CHC's drama alot alot alot. There's one particular Christmas drama in 2006 left a deep impression that it still played in my mind today. Haha... It was just so humorous that I will smiled to myself when I think of that. That's what a lady said when she was being interviewed. "Joseph? Oh Joseph! We love Joseph! He's our man! Very quiet, unassuming, honest till fault I tell you. Well, I can't say the same for Mary. Na Ge Ma Li Ya. Kan Qi Lai Heng Xian Shui, Ke Shi Ta Ku Ren Jian Jiu Huai Yun Le! Hahaa.. Ai Yo, Zhen Gao Bu Dong Xian Zai De Niu Hai Zi, You Shi Hou Kan Qi Hai Si Si Wen Wen De, Ke Shi ..." Haha.. My lap can't type Chinese, but I can still remember 95% of what the lady said. Haha.. =P I'm so looking forward to Christmas this year! =D

It's my sister 19th birthday today! Happy Birthday Sis! Looking forward to go to out tml and having Sakae Sushi on Wed! First time eating.. Haha..

:: Re-Calling Back The Past (2) ::

2008-12-07T15:14:00.003+08:00

When the Christmas drama this year is being reveal - "Operation Saved The World", I kind of recalled what happened to me in the past. . . Haha. . .

I was a "target" in the class among a specific group of friends. I don't know why, maybe they find me cute? LOL.. Just kidding. Very often, I will be "operated" by them. When the lecturers are not around, someone will shout, "Operation Wei Ming", and they will start to pounce on me and they will "rape" me. I was once even stripped till my underwear, thank God my class don't have any girls. If not, I will go to Japan for a face-off. Haha.. Well, I didn't lost my virginity to them of course, but there will be times I get bruises on my body. :'(

I didn't blame them of course, they said that I enjoyed the process so that's why they keep doing on me. O_o I tell them alot alot of times that I didn't, but they didn't believed me, simply because I laughed. I laughed because I feel ticklish. They will keep tickling me and I think that the respond that my body gave is pretty normal I guess. Haha.. Well, unless they tell me that they won't feel so when someone tickles them. =.= Did they came from Mars? Haha..

Well, I am looking forward to this Christmas this year. Candlelight Service is so so romantic. . . Spending time with my members and friends are the best way to celebrate Christmas! =)

:: Joy ::

2008-12-03T14:05:00.004+08:00

When I received good news from Aaron and Joseph, I was very happy for them. Haha.. Well, prayer and fasting works. =)

Going for BS @ Riverwalk later. Gonna buy some stuff too. . . =) Haha.. Well, I wonder why the place is it call Riverwalk. Did someone walk on River like Jesus did 2000 years ago? It then became a miracle and thus it was name Riverwalk? My dad told me many years ago when I was a kid that the canal at Rocher Road near Bugis Area was called "Jie Bin Jiao", direct translation which means "Frozen Ice Bridge". Haha.. Well, I wonder if it's really true in the past.

I am very interested in the history of Singapore. How does Jurong West look like in the year 1500? When I go to heaven one day, I would like to ask God to grand me a "pass", to go back to the past to Jalan Jalan. . . Haha.. I read from the history books and I saw that the costal beach around Singapore is very white, with clear blue water. Haha.. A place which anyone will call it their sanctuary.

(And I, worship You Lord
My life in You restore.
Here is my heart,
Make it Your Sanctuary,
For nobody else
but Jesus only You)

Haha.. That's how random I am. . . =P

Sometimes, I wonder how does heaven look like. When I was young, I always dream that heaven is blue in colour, with clouds floating around. Everyone can fly around as they wish do, and all of us will be wearing white "dress". Haha.. I hope that God will take me to heaven for a tour when I am sleeping one day. Haha.. I wanna see my house in heaven, I wanna see how people will use their talents in serving God in heaven. Is it the same as it happen in the church? Will the ushers in CHC usher the new comers in heaven? Will I be flashing lyrics for the angels to sing praise to God? Will Man-In-Black, the security stood at the Pearly Gates to protect Heaven? For the nursery ministry, will they be taking care of babies? (There will still be life on earth after the Second Coming of Jesus, according to the BS lessons that I have attended last time if I could remember correctly. Will they be taking care of the babies whom their earthly mothers have miscarriages? Just like Ps Phil's first son - Jesse, found in Heaven?) Heaven must be so big that it's bigger than America 10000000000000 times! Haha.. Heaven is a mystery, yet an exciting place to live in. I can't wait to go there. Haha.. =D

Happy birthday to Terence, Pascale & Henry!

:: Above All Else ::

2008-12-02T14:13:00.002+08:00

No eyes has seen
No ear has heard
Unfailing love
Far beyond words

The cross I see
Your blood redeems my imperfection
Your hands divine
Come shape this heart of mine

Here I stand
Thirsting for You
Here I am
Surrender to You
Let my life be Your clay
Mould me in Your way

Here I stand
Desperate for You
Here I am
A vessel for You
Let my life sing You praise
Bring honor to Your name

Beauty unfolds
Joy overflows
Your grace begins
This treasure within

Above all else
Above all else
We exalt you
We exalt you

Ps Ulf prophesy to our church in 2005 that our church music will impact the world. How true it is. =) Hearing to this song, it's as good as Hillsong production, or far better than them. Haha. . . I really love this song.

Serve at Jurong West last Sunday. It was really a good experience. =) After the Expo conversion of laptops to Mac, Jurong West laptops will also be converting to Mac soon. Haha.. Therefore, I will have training for Mac next Wed at Suntec Office. =) Mac is really cool. According to Meng Wei, one of my ministry leader, it can shut down within 20 seconds, and the speed is fast. Haha. . .

2008 is coming to an end soon. That's so fast. This is the year where I ORD, this is the year where I get have my Basic Theory tested, this is the year where I started to step into the working world, this is the year where I find meaningful friendships in MJ Zone, this is the year where I had breakthrough in my ministry, this is the year where I go over to Jurong West to help out, this is the year where so many things happening in my life.

What's going happen next year? I believe 2009 will be the best year yet for me. I have enrol myself in a Accounting course in Kaplan. My school is located at Starhub Center at Orchard Road and I will have lessons from every Tuesday to Thursday, 6.45p.m to 9.45p.m. Starting school on 6 Jan. Haha.. It's been so long since I study. Hope that I can cope well in this school because the "Global Failure Rate" is quite high. Haha. . . At the end of the course, I can do a project with consist of a 6,500 words of essays which can be converted to a degree. =)

From today onwards, I must grew in a deeper relationship with numbers, because that's what I will be dealing with in my future career. I should be stepping into the world of numbers in 2012. I will be 27 by then. Getting married and buying house by 2015. Buying my first car by 2016. Form family by 2017. Promotion by 2020. Retire by 2035, that's when I am 50 years old. So old le. . . I shall dream dreams with my beloved wife. . .

:: Re-Calling Back The Past ::

2008-11-26T17:01:00.006+08:00

I saw Joseph at the first night of Asia Conference. The Joseph I am talking about is not the one from W372, but he is my secondary school friend. We catch up abit and he was in a hurry back home with his friend, so we didn't really talk much.

Actually, few weeks back, I have notice him in Service 2, but I am not sure if its really him because we have not been seeing each other since 2002 after we graduated from secondary school. I was in a hurry to the toilet that time and I though I may say "Hi" after I come back, but he's not at his seat already, so I didn't really think too much about it anymore.

We have been in the same class since Sec 2. Back then, I have a classmate - Dwight, and he share about Christ with me. Every time during recess, Dwight will approached me and he will shared the gospel with me, giving me bible studies, etc. However, I didn't go to his church as my mum is strongly against it. Soon, when my other classmate knew that I am a christian, I was being "laugh" by some of my classmates, and I remember Joseph saying, "Why you become a christian? You see all christian white white one". Haha.. Well, I was quite tanned that time because I was in a uniform group - SJAB while my christian classmate is really fair skin one. Haha. . . Dwight decided to give me a christain name - Daniel. When I used it, I was being "scolded" by the girls. =.= Reason being "Daniel" is used by handsome guys, and their idol is Daniel Chen Xiao Dong. Haha.. Well I guess we were all kids back at those days.

Now, he has been attending church, I am not sure if he has been integrated to his friend's CG. Besides, he is not fair and he's quite tanned too. Haha.. Indeed, salvation is here. Hope to catch up with Joseph Tan more. =)

:: Asia Conference 2008 ::

2008-11-24T01:26:00.003+08:00

This is the most exciting conference that I have ever attended! The 5 intensive days is just jam packed with people from 72 countries and a total of more than 20,000 delegates, plus our church membership of 24,000 ppl. It's really amazing.

I did a very "bad" thing during the first night of the conference. Hmm. . . Not really a bad thing, but I was just not tactful with my words, and it happened during the 5 minute conversation with our neighbours. My neighbour is a local delegate from a church in Singapore, but she will attend Service 2 every Saturday in Expo, (I am in serious trouble), and she will attend her own church Service on Sunday.

Our conversation goes on, until it came to this part, which I say something wrong.
Me: "So how long have you been a christian?"
Her: "Oh. . . For a very long time already"
Me: "Oic.. Since you were a youth?"
Her: "Ya.. My frenz brought me to church back then"
Me: "Wow.. That's so long ago"

She was silence when I say that. My mind was in a blank too. Then I realised that what I just say is trying to say that she is very old. =.= (Most woman are very sensitive about age)

God, I pray and I pray and I pray that I won't bump into her in Service 2. God, I pray that You will speak into her heart and move her to go over to Service 1 in Jurong West! I pray this in Jesus most precious name, Amen!!

I was sharing this "humour" with Samuel the following night, and he was half smiling, and I guess half surprise. Haha.. We were at Hall 10 when I share this to him, just then, the LED screen show the video of Tips and Stuff and the title was "How to have a good conversation", and it was just about 1-2 minutes after I shared with him! Both Samuel and I was just laughing away. LOL. . . And Samuel to me, "This is for you." LOL.. And I think I say "Amen". =.= (I think the video crew of Tips & Stuff can consider my example to produce it. Hahahaha)

God, forgive me, for I don't know what I say.

I love the new song "Elevate", "The God I Know", "Heaven", etc alot. I wanted to get hold of the CD!! However, it stopped me because my savings are really depleting and I don't think it can last me till December. I am still jobless and I wonder should I go to Changi Village to earn a living. Haha.. No lah, I was just kidding and I won't do such things. I believe that God will provide for me. =)

Among all the night sessions that I have attended, I enjoyed the last session the most. Not really because it is a beautiful night with a grand closing, but its because what Dr A.R Bernard preach and I can catch the most among the rest of the preachers. Haha. . . I'm not saying the rest of the preachers don't know how to preach, its I don't receive it well. Thankfully, I received the Word the most at the last session, although it might not directly apply for me for now. =)

Some things happened and it set me into thinking. Something is pulling me away, something is drawing me back. What will happen to me in the end? I don't know. I guess I shall soon find out an answer. Something is happening. . .

:: Updates ::

2008-11-11T23:11:00.007+08:00

Had an interview with Keppel Shipyard this morning. Haha.. This is the first time I had a proper interview. The other time I had interview with Singapore Power was a very simple one, I was just being inform of my job scope and I was being hired the next day. (They need people urgently cuz of the system upgrading) Haha..

I could say that I did my best ba. Well, I am not a man of many words. :'( So, when the lady interview me, I didn't express myself very well. Never mind. Whether I am hired anot, its another thing. =) At least, I gained an experience of having interview. Haha..

The environment is not those very high class working environment. Alot of workers with helmet can be seen walking around, with super huge ships, etc. The environment is just like the Channel 8 drama few years ago, "最高点" by Christopher Lee and Dawn. Haha.. It will be quite a good experience if I work there. So in my life, I would say that I have deal with F16 and ships before. Haha.. =D

I was just browsing through the hardware zone about MLM . Well, I am NOT surprised by alot of negative comments about them. Well, it may seem suitable for some people, but definitely not for me. In my past experience working with a company somewhere in Shenton Way in 2004, I had a super bad experience with them. I was quite excited about this company when I initially joined. Haha.. Soon, I realised that its not what I really want. My upline will always say why I have no friends and will force me to bring friends. (Of course lah, if I bring friend, they earn money mah) I remember there are about 2 guys who share "testimony" of how this company has change them. The tone that they use has betray them. They change because they want to prove to others of what they can achieved in life, but their character seems to be the same anyway. It's the character that will bring you far in life, not by the achievements in life. Your attitude determines your altitude. They will always asked me to go down to to learn new things. Haha.. Do I apply them in life now? I have already long forgotten what I learn. Most of my uplines has already quit for good. (About more than 5 ba, but that's 4 years ago. Could be more than this figure by now) I really thank God that I am no longer dealing with such "business". =)

I would still prefer to earn money by the skills that I have contributed to the company, not by calling people down to the company to listen to some crap. Call me old fashion or what, I don't care. =)

P.S: Hey my friends, I am not targeting anyone when I am blogging this. :) If you are in MLM line, you are still my friend. Just don't keep bugging me to listen to your company's stories. :)

I am trusting God for His provision. =)

:: Back from BS ::

2008-11-05T23:59:00.000+08:00

God grant my desire today. I have always been complaining how bored I am at home. (I did search for jobs, but the doors seems to be shut.) By faith, I believe that I should be receiving good news this 2 weeks! Anyway, because of the desire for the borness to be filled, there are activities that kept me occupied from Wed to Sun. Haha.. I request Jian for me to be excuse on Thursday as I don't want to go out everyday as my mum won't like it, but I will still be going to Jurong Point to buy Printer from Harvy Norman tml as my mum needs it. =.=

Learn about "Discerning Balance" today. The bible says that we should walk the narrow way, and at the same time, we have to be beware of Antinomianism and Legalism. We cannot always think that God's grace are cheap and keep sinning and keep thinking that God will keep forgiving us. Yes, God will forgive us for our sins, but we cannot take it for granded. God has emotions too. =) It's quite fearing when Jeremy talks deep about this lesson. No saying that Jeremy cook up story to scare his students, but its from the bible.

“Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. Many will say to Me in that day, ‘Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?’ And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!’
- Matt 7:21-23

Bringing it on to the other end, we should not be like the Pharisees. They like to major on the minor and minor on the major and come out with man-made laws. Haha. . . When Jesus performed healing on the Sabbath Day, the Pharisees make noise. (Imagine like the typical Ah Bengs and Ah Lians in a typical neighbourhood school disturbing the class) Haha.. No lah, just kidding. The Pharisees asked why Jesus was working on the Sabbath Day, but was being shoot back. (Serve them right. Haha.. =P) Imagine a man who is going to die and you say, "Oh... I cannot save you today. Because today is the Sabbath Day", and you watch the man die painfully and slowly? So the Pharisees have miss out the whole point over here. The people will worship God on that day, so is there anything wrong with the man who receive healing from God? God is omnipresent. He did not just appear on weekdays and disappear on weekends. Our God is a true and a living God who is 24/7 available. How great is our God! =)

Meet Derek after BS at Central. After that, we go walk walk around the shops along Singapore River. It's really a beautiful sight with different colours of lights reflecting on the water, the beautiful lights along the street. Haha.. See, light attracts people. Therefore, Christians have to be the light of the world. Haha.. It is really a romantic sight. . . (Wei Ming is dreaming of falling in love) Haha.. Don't get the wrong idea. We are not gay couple. Nothing wrong with two guys walking down a beautiful street together. LOL.. =P

That's all for today. Going to sleep and off to Jurong West for Prayer Meeting. =)

:: Morning Prayer Meeting @ JW ::

2008-11-04T09:24:00.004+08:00

A good morning to start with to pray. =) Really wanna thank the church for having such prayer meetings. Haha... The auditorium was filled with people and the atmosphere was good.

God answer one of my prayers! Haha.. An unusual thing happened when I pray for this particular thing regarding about my family on Monday, and I was abit surprised when the "someone" in my family actually talked to me, although it's just one sentence. - "If you want to eat, you can take it." Haha.. That "someone" has actually declare a cold war to almost all of my family members, and will only talked to us when required any help. Sometimes when I talk to that "someone", is as if I am talking to a wall. Although the situation did not turn out to be completely good, but at least God is doing something in my family. =)

When I prayed last time, my mouth will just say and my mind will not focus on what I am praying. After Pastor Kong share about the fourth dimension and Sharon talk about prayers, my thinking about prayer change. The new revelation of prayer comes when Sharon asked us to pray for those members who are not here in CG, and to focus on them. I believe that its really powerful.

"For as he thinks in his heart, so is he."
- Pro 23:7

As we begin to think while we pray, God say "so is he". Therefore, when the words that proceed from our mouth plus the thoughts from our heart, I believe the prayer that you just pray is very powerful. Haha.. So, I am gonna to focus what I prayed now, focusing on the outcome of what God will do, and not just the problems itself. Very often, if you focus on the problem, most of the time, it will still be a problem, because that is what you focus when you pray. So, let's just focus on the victory, the breakthrough, and VISUALISE that God has already did it for us! Haha.. Haha.. My favorite vocabulary is "VISUALISE" for now. =)

I just realised that it's my blog birthday today! Pls send it your wishes for him! =D Happy Birthday buddy! Do you know where your name came from? It's blog is actually named after an inspirational worship song "God of My Forever". Haha.. Nice blog name right? =P

:: A Touch From God ::

2008-11-03T00:05:00.004+08:00

As the previous blog that I have mentioned, some things happened during the end of the fellowship yesterday and I was grieved. Well, McFlurry doesn't help me for long, because I am just like numbing my feelings for a short while. It came back to me again. So I decided to go to the House of God - City Harvest Church @ Jurong West, Service 4 to experience something, a healing of my heart.

I was late for Service. By that time, the congregation were already in the midst of worship, singing "Worshiping You". Still, I managed to get a good seat and I worshiped God. Tears begin to flow down as two unhappy incident kept coming into my mind. I kept pouring out my emotions, as I want God to heal my hurts, my doubts and a certain relationship. Beside coming to God in church, I have no other way of expressing my hurts to God during that time. I want to ran to a place to hide, and that's church. If I continued to stay at home that time, I don't know what will happen to me.

Whenever I go for double service - Sat Expo and Sunday JW for serving, I will had a clearer message about what Pastor preached. Yes, I will do the unusual so that I can see my life being manifested! Haha. . .

Hmm.. Although I feel the touch of God during that Service, but my feelings are still much affected, but not as much. =) Back home, I couldn't take it again. I ran to my room to cry. I asked God to show me, asked God for an answer. I just kept crying and crying.

I saw Kelvin online, and I had a chat with him. Man, he was really a good listener and very sincere. Thinking back, I have rarely share with him much about my life. After sharing with him, he ask if I have any other prayer request, and I just share with him. And blam! I really feel very very much better. - I think he had just prayed for me! Hahaa.. And I have "No More Tears". (Johnson & Johnson Baby Shampoo) Haha.. Things started to change when I asked him if its okay if I SMS the members to join in to pray for him. (Louisa knows the outcome. . .) Haha.. This whole afternoon, I really see how God heal my heart. The healing may not be instant, but it will come for sure. =)

I also shared with him alot of my stories. How my English names - Simon, Daniel came about, how I used to have alot of other English names, and some other stuff. I never knew Kelvin is someone who will "bother" to care one. Haha.. Really, I feel so bless this afternoon. =)

Of course, love is not just about receiving, its about giving too. Even though I may not be loved back, I will still want to try to love others, because that is the DNA of my Father in heaven. =)

I also had a good chat with Louisa just now. Haha.. Louisa, don't worry about me k? I will learn to guard my heart, protect my spirit and don't let other people problems affected it. ^^ Thanks so much. Lastly, thank You God, for placing me in such a wonderful family in CHC, and in W421. =)

:: Arise & Build ::

2008-11-02T02:27:00.005+08:00

Great service! This year Arise & Build is very very different from the previous campaign. The atmosphere is very different and the way Pastor flow with the Service also change. Haha.. Well, it was really good. =)

Fellowship was very good with W421 at T3, and we bump into Ruyi! Haha.. So "qiao" right? She didn't join us for fellowship as she was with her study friends. Hmm.. Looking forward for you to join us wor.. ^^

Went over to viewing gallery to fellowship and we saw a big CG there. Haha.. Our secret spot is not longer secret anymore. =.= Still, it was good and it was a good time chatting, and with Louisa's greatest tutor - Samuel that joined us. Haha.. So "qiao" his brother is a CGL in MJ Zone. Haha. . . So many "qiao".. Is God showing us that our CG will have a new member call Qiao Qiao? =P

Anyway. . . Something happen towards the end of the fellowship while we are leaving the airport and I was quite grieved. :'( Haiz. . . Hopefully all things will turn out well in the end. I pray that I will be more tactful in my words in future. Or maybe, I will just keep my mouth shut and be as quiet as a mouse.

There are so many things that I want to write here, but I can't as it's rather sensitive. Anyway, all things will turn out good for those who love Him. =) Get myself a Mcflurry ice-cream to numb myself, and it helps. =)

NS guys, do Jia You wor.. =) Aaron, Yan Qiu, Kelvin, Terence & Derek. - You guys will be always in our prayers! A song dedicated for you...

"Everyday I live I know You're my God,
I lift my face and look to You my God.
Even when I am being screamed and pumped for no reasons,
I'll stand with You, my Jesus take my all."

Joseph, you are not forgotten too. ^^ I pray for your 10 days adventure in Tekong shall be a great one.

"My God reigns,
His love will never me.
My God reigns,
He's ruling over all.
All my life,
In every situation I know.
My God is greater,
My God is over all"

I pray that in every situations that you go through in Tekong, you will face it strongly and confidently. God is always greater than all the situation that we go through. =) Keep trusting. . .

:: 100th Post ::

2008-10-31T03:01:00.003+08:00

Wooo.. This blog has gone through, stay with me for almost a year le. And I am celebrating its 100th post today! Haha. . . Sorry blog, no birthday cake for you, simply because its not your actual birthday and you can't eat the cake unless I smash the cake on the laptop screen. =P

Why blog? Well, interesting question. Pastor always mention that people will tend to forget what they learn if they never copy down notes. However, I couldn't write down what happen in my life, so I just blog lor. . . But sometimes I will purposely left out those incidents which are not so good to remember one. Since I have the gift of STM(Short Team Memory), therefore I exercise my faith in using that gift for this purpose, so that I won't remember what happen to me. Haha.. Yeah, I'm talking crap now. Haha.. If you have attended FF1 Lesson 3 which talks about Discerning Truth, you will know that the gift that I have is fake!

And yepx.. I have been attending FF1 for 3 lessons now. It was conducted by Jeremy, a ZS in Service 3. (He introduced himself that way in Lesson 1) A pretty interesting teacher and his lessons are never boring. (Of course right? How can an interesting teacher teach boring lesson?) =.= Haha.. So anyway, it was a good step as I have not been attending BS lessons for ages. My ex-BS teacher cum ZS is the same person. Haha.. I miss those times man, especially his laughter. Hahaa... Oh yeah, I saw him at Riverwalk Toilet on Wed, and he can still remember my name. So touch.. Haha.. Cuz the other time he only remember I am from Sharon's CG. =D

It's Arise & Build this weekend! I have an amount already, but the faith inside of me isn't too strong. I believe that as I begin to give, God will do something good in my family. (Yeah, my family is going through some kind of problems now, but it's much better now compare to the blog sometime ago, but it can be BETTER!) Areas like my breakthroughs, healings, career, studies, etc. It's machiam like a turning point in my life. =)

Do pray for me yeah? I looking for a job now and I hope that I can save up enough money for my course fees in ACCA(its not a CCA, its ACCA), Driving Course(not very passionate about it but will still want to go since I have pass my Basic Theory), Guitar(maybe its time for me to learn guitar? I wanna to have guitar to blend in with my QT. Sharon also ask who want to learn guitar a few times. Haha.. Actually I kind of interested lah.. But hor, dun wanna take a step of faith to buy, plus its $$$), transportation, bills, tithes, offerings, and endless of buying this and that, etc. Haha.. So, money is really important, but I have to guard my heart, and not to let it rule over me. ^^

God, in You I trust. I surrender my all to You, in exchange for all of You. =)

:: The Boon Lay Friendship ::

2008-10-27T10:26:00.004+08:00

I meet up with Joseph this morning to have breakfast together. It was a great time of fellowship and a time of catching up with each other lives. =)

I get to know Joseph earlier this year in May outside Marina Square on one of the Saturday nights after Service through Louisa. At first, I didn't really know him well because we didn't have each other contacts. Haha.. Very detail and precise right? =P It was only until after his BMT and before his OCS we started to hit off the friendship as we have each other's contact. Firstly, we are of the same zone (as of May 2008) and secondly, we stay at Boon Lay too. Travelling to Expo from Boon Lay was one of the most boring journey ever since CHC shifted there, so I will divided it into three stages. From Boon Lay to Redhill - Stage 1 (Before Tunnel). From Tiong Bahru to Lavender - Stage 2 (Inside Tunnel). From Kallang to Expo - Stage 3 (After Tunnel). Haha. . . So I thought, "Hey, maybe the journey to church won't be bored anymore." But so far we haven travel together, but soon it will.. Haha. . .

I want to treasure this friendship alot cuz he is someone who is very different from the people that I have known in church. He have this character in him that really draw friends to him, and I just couldn't explain it. Haha... He's one of the main reason why I look forward for my breakthroughs. Haha.. Is he so impactful in my life? I would say, "Yes". =)

Hearing his NS stories, I would think, I am really bless that I didn't go through this tough times during my NS. Some might say, "So are you trying to say that God love you more than Joseph?" Of course no man. =) God has a different purpose for us when He place His people. God never intend to make him suffer in OCS, but I believe that it is to make him to have a stronger character and a greater leadership. Really feel so him because it's not an easy journey to go through, if I am inside, I wonder what will happen to me. . . Haha. . . As I was blogging, it just remind me of one verse in 1 Cor 10:13 - "He will keep the temptation from becoming so strong that you can't stand up against it." Similarly, God will not made us suffer what we can't take it. It is through this that will break us, mould us, shape us to be a great leader in God's Kingdom. Amen? =)

Joseph, you must Jia You k? =) Looking forward to address you as LTA Joseph in June 2009! Kelvin, you are included too.. ^^

All the best in your OCS Joseph, and a toast to our friendship!

:: Updates ::

2008-10-26T23:59:00.002+08:00

I would like to thank everyone, especially my beloved CG, W421, so giving me a surprise on the day before my birthday! Haha.. This is one of the greatest gift that I have ever receive in my entire 23 years of my life! It's made with love, and I was just overwhelmed by the gift. Haha.. Really so touch, and I tell God, "God, I don't deserve such gifts and love from them."

Not forgetting people like Joseph, Catherine, Si Hui(Chorus Board) Robert, Gen, Paul, Wilfred, YiLin, Thomas, Elfie, Aldrich, Yik Hoe, Afiq and Roger who send me their wishes. Especially Joseph, who call to wish me even thought he is very busy inside camp, really appreciated all of you guys, I feel so love. (I am flying.. I am flying.. - Rose, Female Lead Actress in Titanic)

And how can I forget my another wonderful family in CHC? Haha.. I am so touch by Chorus Board when they celebrated my birthday! Haha.. Especially the speech Meng Wei, Jacelyn and Rosa. Rose keep challenging me to visualise what are the achievements will I get for my next birthday, and its quite stressful. Haha.. Cuz I have to be very precise for my wish! (Maybe she just graduated from SOT this year, that's why she is a very very detail person) Hahaha..

Gifts I received from both my CG and Chorus Board, includes T-Shirt, sweets, lamp, pillow and a awesome CD by CCC. I am just so blown away by the gifts! I have been wanting to buy a CD badly for my QT, but I keep stopping myself from buying cuz its too expensive. Haha.. Thank you very much guys! =) Now, I can also use the lamp from my CG to do QT, to imagine myself in the Holy of the Holies when I switch of the lights. Hehe.. =P

Recently, I heard from one of my close friends that he/she just lost a very close friend of his/hers. I do not really know the reasons why they break off this friendship, but it is his/her friend who wants to break it off. They use to be very close, but due to some other commitments, they seldom contact le. Sad huh?

You see, we are only close with the circle of friends of our influences, for me I have my CG, church, workplace, etc. We are close with them because we are seeing each other for almost every day or every week. For my poly, sec, pri school friends, I have seldom contact with them le, but does that make them strangers? NO! Of course NO! I just don't understand why his/her friend have such concept in his/her mind. I never contact the person means I don't friend that person? What a childish and selfish thinking, only wants people to love them and not taking the ownership of the friendship. Friendship is a two way thing, Period!

As we get older in age and progress in life, our circle of friends will change for sure, however to maintain the friendship, both parties have to take the ownership of the friendship. We will be busy in our lives, our studies, careers and sometimes we may not be as close as before, but still, we have to be make an effort to be interested in their lives, and not waiting for people to be knocking on your door to ask about you, etc.

Of course, if your friends have hurt you, you have to try to forgive them, but you can don't trust him/her completely. It doesn't mean that if you don't trust the person means you don't forgive them. I have some friends that I don't really trusted already, giving up hopes on them, but that doesn't mean that I don't forgave them or they are no longer my friends. =) (I did blog about a particular friendship that I have given up hope sometime back, but I guess I should forgive ba, but of course, trusting is a not a overnight thing, I think it will take a very long time for me to trust this person again)

:: Updates ::

2008-10-20T02:21:00.008+08:00

Emo is the best word to describe me few hours ago, but I am pretty okay now after I share some stuff with Louisa after Service. Erm. . . Not really something very serious or bad, but something which everyone would long to have in their lifetime, not a bf/gf in this case, not something very big like our visions and dreams, but rather something simple - Friendship.

Friendship is the key which draws everyone together, like a group of atoms forming a molecule, the stronger the bond, the stronger the friendship. Sometimes I wonder, do I have a best friend in church? I would think for a very long time, but it seems that I just couldn't find the answer. (I need a brother to be my best friend because one of my love language is Physical Touch, so I would like to have a hug sometimes)

W421 are a group of very good friends that I have in church definitely. They are the best group of people to hang out with and fellowship with. However, somethings seems to be lacking between us. Maybe, I just haven found out any common topics that I would easily talk to them. Sometimes, I couldn't really catch the language they were talking about, and I feel so out of the world.

Dancing? Err.. No bah, the sun will rise from the west if Wei Ming likes dancing. K-boxing? Err.. Not really bah.. Wei Ming have no courage to sing. (Last time I sing with them machiam like talking to the mic) Haiz. . . Well, the only thing I think of is the common interest with Glenn and Louisa, because the 3 of us likes to make cards and gifts for CG while Louisa and I are more of having the "welfare" for the CG. We would be calling up each other to discuss what should we do for who, what surprises should we give, etc.

Louisa share with me that best friends need not to be find outside of CG, but it can be found within our CG itself. Si Hui and I talks quite easy too, but its the difference in gentle that set us apart(Not bias against sisters). I need time to understand Sharon better, because most of the time I look up to her as my CGL, like students looking up upon teachers in school. I can tell that she can be a very good friend, but I need more time to understand her. Hmm.. From what I know, she likes Smurfs, Soft-toys, Mango, Redhill Market Ice-Kachang? Also, I need more time to be close with Wei Jian, although we can talk easily to each other, but he's more of I look up to him as a spiritual brother to share things with and a counsellor. Hmm.. he love designing and have passion for youth? (However, that's not enough, I need more time to understand more of members' character and their language, not just their likes and dislikes)

You can see that I keep saying, more time, more time and more time, but hey, I have been in this CG for almost 2 years! We have been seeing each other for 52(weeks) x (2 - 1 CG, 1 Service) x 2 years already. That's about we have been seeing each other for about 208 times!! Isn't that more than enough time?? So when will it be? Till the second coming of Jesus Christ? Till our CG multiply and we don't really understand each other and wait till the next CG multiply and the cycle goes around again and again??

Set me into deep thinking, but will I do it? That's the other question. Is there a difference between understand members and having a best friend, I wonder?

Maybe, I shouldn't pin too much hopes of having a very best friend in church. Higher expectations will lead to a perfect friendship which is very impossible, because no one is ever perfect. Sometimes, we will do face disappointments from people if they didn't meet our needs, especially for a very sensitive person like me. Of course, I don't expect every single friends to meet all my needs, I am not some big shot of what, even Jesus Himself, not all His needs are meet by His disciples during His ministry days. I got to learn to give, to learn to take.

Wei Ming is gonna make an effort to understand his members now. =)

:: Crazy Mission ::

2008-10-15T00:35:00.004+08:00

Decided to train my body as it has not been properly being maintain since I ORD. So, I decided to went for a jog. =)

Previously when I jog, I will always run the usual route around my house. However, this time round, I decided to take a challenge. I run along a road that I have never run before, and I reach SAFTI Military Institute! Haha.. Crazy right? Well, it's actually quite near to my house, just that it's not a common route that people will take to jog, so I decided to be a joker to jog. Haha. . .

Actually, I quite like the route that I jog because it's new, although its along the road and there are cars and lorries passing by. Haha. Well, I am not sure if OCS is located inside the camp, but I am quite sure that it could be inside, although I have not been to OCS before. So, I begin to start praying for the OCS guys, especially for Kelvin and Joseph. Not sure if it works, but I remember Chloe did this for her Marsiling Sec kids, so I decided to try it out too. Hahaa.. =P

I will be running more often this few days, more of the crazy route that I have chosen, to train for my IPPT. =)

Just to side track abit. How should you react when the birthday guy ask you if you were to celebrate birthday for him? Well, I experience that last Thursday. I was happily preparing myself to go out when this guy call me. I was stunned, lost of words, don't know what to say. Haha... So, I just encourage him to come for the meeting, but he say he consider first. Well, in the end, he did come.

Sometimes, I would desire the wisdom from God, so that I can really speak in a right way. =)

I stumble upon this photo when I was cleaning up my room just now. Man, it just bring back the memories of the good old days. . . . .

This photo was taken in 1950. Back den, I was still a young and strong 18 year old man. A happy go lucky guy, no worries and leading a carefree life. I came from a well to do family and money isn't a problem for me.

One day, I was bored and decided to go to the nearby river to catch some fighting fish to fight with my friends. Upon reaching the river bank, I was careless and I fell into a deep pit, it was so dark, very very dark. . .

When I woke up, everything was different, and I realised that I have come into the year 2003. From then on, I start my life new. No one knows my past, until now, the photo which I have shown you. . . I really miss my family and friends badly. . .

:: Loneliness ::

2008-10-13T17:21:00.003+08:00

Although I can have a good rest at home, but I am pretty lonely. Yawn. . . How I wish that I could find something to do, to make myself useful. How I wish that I could SMS my friends all day long, but I couldn't possibly take out their time for the whole day. How I wish that I can go out, but I can't because I have to start saving money for the upcoming Arise & Build.

Submitting my resume for a final check before I submit to the company. Hopefully I can get the job as an application consultant. =)

:: Updates ::

2008-10-12T16:09:00.003+08:00

Service was great, had a better revelation when I attend Service 4 during serving. =)

Brother Poh is back in leading praise again! So happy to see him leading and the whole church echo as well.

I was serving side board at Jurong West today. I went back to Main Hall to do side board, and I made plenty of mistake. Flashing the wrong verse, wrong bridge. LOL.. =P Thank God that the musicians didn't sing wrongly, or else you will see my head roll. HaHa.. I was being commented by Annabell. Well, not a very positive comments of course. But she was kind and forgiving, and she didn't scold me like a tigress. Hahaha.. Of course, I welcome any reprimand because I made the mistake. In ministry field, it's very important to have the spirit of excellence, because you are not just doing your job, you are serving God and basically the people, or the whole church. One mistake made can damage the atmosphere and the spirit of the whole congregation. Cheering myself on, especially when Arise & Build and Asia Conference are drawing near. =)

Jia You to my friends who are in OCS, BMT and in the army. =)

:: Freedom ::

2008-10-07T15:05:00.002+08:00

I have been waiting for this moment for a very long time. Indeed, the sufferings, scoldings, unhappiness are finally over. Haha.. Just kidding, it's not as bad as what I have just mention above, but rather, I can reward my poor body who has been "physically abuse" by work. =)

Wait a minute. Don't get the wrong idea. I am not into any prostitution in the past. It's just that I am not a very morning person, so I don't like to drag myself out of the bed early in the morning. That's why I say I am being physically abuse. Haha.. Okay, I should use mentally abuse instead.

I will be applying for another soon. It's related to some admin stuff. Well, I just love doing admin stuff. Haha... Although it might sounds boring, at least it's not as challenging as programing and other kind of work. =)

:: hAvinG thE attiTudE foR gROwth ::

2008-09-27T00:03:00.004+08:00

It was a great CG today. Sharon share the message about "Having the attitude of growth". I may not be the one who sows, but I may be the one who reaps. Well, that of course doesn't makes the end of sowing, but things really boils down to our heart for growth. I guess, I need to reflect ba. . . . Someone pass me a mirror please. Maria, where are you?

This week of work hasn't been really smooth, and I have to admit that there are times I talk to people rather unfriendly. =( Thinking back, I think I should have remain my cool ba, even though they might be nasty, but I must not be too naive too. Well, the art of customer service is not very easy to master. Haha. . . I gonna learn, standing in the prospect of their view and my view, to have a win-win situation, so that I can be a good worker for God. I like what one of my church leader say, "God is my boss".

As I was going home after CG, I bump into my ex-ZS, Ming Jing! Haha. . . Well, at first I wasn't really dare to approach him, but I did. I wave to him.

MJ: "You are from Sharon Ruth CG right? W421. ."
Me: "Yepx"
MJ give me a pad on my back and say
"Different zone liao hor".
Me: "Yeah"

We say goodbye to each other as he headed for another direction and I headed home.

Haha. . . Well, I kind of miss him already. Although we didn't really interact much while I am still in his zone, but he leaves a great impression for me as a ZS. I love his BS lessons and during the Prayer Meetings occasionally. I guess, he also leave behind a deep impression to alot of my cell group members. It won't be so easy to bump into him as he belongs to JW Service 1. Haha. . . Anyway, I am now serving in JW on Sundays, so I may have the opportunity to bump into him also, but so far haven yet. Haha. . .

Next week will be my last week with SP. Thinking back, I kind of starting to miss working there already. The staff lounge that I usually relax, the food that I use to eat, the fellowship of my colleagues, supervisor and customers. . . Haha. . . Well, but I have decided to leave. However, I thank God for placing me there, because this is a good training ground for me to start a new journey in my life.

:: Looking Forward For That Day ::

2008-09-23T00:40:00.007+08:00

Which day? It's the day where every single member of W421 can gather together in Cell Group or in Service. It will be a day where the cell group photo will be the most precious because it is just so hard to capture everyone together in a picture.

Kelvin will be confine for 3 weeks in OCS. By the time he is release, Pascale will be in India, and she will take about 3 weeks to come back. When she come back, Aaron and Yan Qiu could be involve in field camps, or SIT test. Terence will also be involve in his overseas "mission trip". Hopefully, we can really gather together to take just one photo before we multiply or we enter into 2009. =) Will it be Christmas or before that? Well, I believe that it will be the day where every member will be looking forward to.

Not forgetting all the wonderful old members of W421, you know who you are. =) How I wish that we can really gather back again. . .

I believe that photos are precious as it paints a beautiful memory in our mind when we see them. The laughter, the voices of the members will soon start to fade when we grow older, but the photos remains forever. . .

This will be one of my Christmas wishes for this year, and I hope that it will come to past. . . =)

:: Updates ::

2008-09-22T01:06:00.002+08:00

It's a Monday morning and here again I am thinking of how am I going to go through another week again. Am I really liking what I am doing? Or do I just work for the sake of money? Haha. .

Well, when times are good, I will want to look forward to work and stay on. When times are bad, I will want to think of quitting right away. What do you call this kind of working attitude? I would say that I am someone who is afraid of challenges. Just because I face something difficult, I will want to quit right away. Haha. . . Well, I need to face up to the reality that not all things are so easy to work with, and I must really face the challenges.

I can't do it by my own strength, nor I can't convince myself that it's gonna be easy. I have to depend on God, and live on by people's encouragement. However, there's a point I have to understand, which is people can't be always by your side encouraging you, because they do not belong to you 100% totally or they are sold to you as encourager slaves. Haha. . . So, that's the part where God will come in to minister to us whenever we need the strength to draw upon, which is by reading the word of God and having a quiet time with Him.

Sometimes I wonder, am I really loving God? Or am I just someone who is religiously doing something just because it's a duty? Am I following the heart beat of Jesus? Someone once say this, "Check your heart once in a while".

Meet up with Joseph from W372 at Pioneer Mall just now. It was a good time chatting with him. Haha.. Not forgetting Louisa who play a part in the telephone conversation. Haha.. Somehow, it really brightens our night! Hahaa.. "I am going to become a XXX. I have XXXX into a XXX XXXXXX before." Don't worry Louisa, this will be a secret between 3 of us. Haha. . . So, you dun bully me hor, or else I will tell Sharon. Hahaha...

Best wishes for your exciting 9 months in OCS Kelvin and Joseph. Looking forward to see your fullness of glory shine forth in June!

:: Changes ::

2008-09-14T23:44:00.002+08:00

Sharon just announced during Cell Group last Friday that we'll be moving out of MJ Zone and going into JS Zone. Well, to me, I wasn't really excited or very sad about the changes. Maybe, I still have not yet develop a close relationship with the zone people yet, that's why I didn't really feel anything for the changes. I like my ex-ZS, Ming Jing alot, he's really a good leader over the zone and I love the style when he share the word and often challenge his students to use the gifts of the Holy Spirit.

Had a outing with Zes's CG at Sentosa today. It was fun, but yet flesh crucifying. :'( Had to wake up early on a Sunday morning to make my way down. Haha. . . Well, the outing was good and I had fun. Great to interact with the new friends, especially Du Liang, Clarance and Jian Ping. Pascale was quite funny when she describe Du Liang's name. "Du Du Du Du Du Du Du Du Du Du".. Haha..

Recently, things have not been going well in my family. I feel so burden. I don't wish to see my mum cry. I don't wish to see quarrels going on. All because of one person, and it spark so many unhappiness in the family. May God bless that person who's creating such a harvo in my family indirectly, maybe it wasn't entirely that person's fault, but I can say that "he/she" does play a part too. Blood is always thicker than water, and I believe in that. Who feed you when you were hungry? Who gave you clothes to wear when you were naked? Who gave you a shelter to live in? Who bless you the money and all the things which is not earn by you? I won't dare to say that all of us should share the same values as I did as some of us may come from different family backgrounds. Unless or otherwise, you will still want to be with your family one day.

Please pray for my family. . .

:: Monday ::

2008-09-09T00:11:00.002+08:00

Work was quite okay today. Thank God for Aldrich who help to ease my workload. =) Hopefully I can really buck up in my work, to do something for what I have been lagging behind others.

I am starting to like my supervisor more and more. She's kind of cute and the way she talk to people on the phone really make me laugh sometimes. I can't help myself but giggle or laughing to myself for no reasons. I think if my colleague were to see this they will think I am crazy. Hahaha..

Don't get it wrong, Wei Ming hasn't fall in love with any girls, so don't even talk about ladies. Hahaha... So far I still haven develop any feelings for girls yet, nor any girls have develop feelings for me. So I will just walk alone from earth into eternity for now.

"Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen.
Show me how to love like
You have love me.
Break my heart for what break Yours
Everything I am for Your Kingdom cause
As I walk from earth into eternity"

This is one of my most favourite song "Hosanna" bridge. One of the line, "Open up my eyes to the things unseen" - I will ask God to open up my eyes to see who should I choose. So when you see me start singing this song for no reason, you should know why. =P Or maybe I will just confess the last line. "As I walk from earth into eternity". . .

:: Sunday ::

2008-09-07T12:08:00.006+08:00

It's been months since I have been tagged. Thanks Xuan and Fel. I really appreciate your thoughts. =) Although the hits grew little by little, no one has tagged it for nearly 3 months. Haha. . .

As I have mention earlier in my previous post, this week has really been terrible because I had make a very grave mistake in work. Thankfully, my supervisor was very supportive and she didn't scold me. However, she have to write a report to the boss. I was in a loss, I couldn't believe that I could have make such a silly mistake. My supervisor says that I might be ask to leave before my contract ends. Although I long to leave, but I don't want to chose this path of leaving.

That's the reason why I didn't share my testimony when Sharon asks us to share. Hurt and confuse on the inside, I don't know how to express myself out. I couldn't tell my CG that I praise God that he have bought me to this path right? Although I remember one good incident that happen, but my chance is gone. :'(

When I was calling one of the customers, after finishing getting details from him. He ask for my name. Then he said to me, "Wei Ming? Nice name". When he say that, I was flying. I have never thought that my name was nice before, or no one has ever say to me before. I was very happy when he say that to me. I wrote on the rough paper and say, "God, thank You so much for making my name wonderful".

Alot of thoughts run through my mind, thoughts of leaving, thoughts of failure, thoughts of lousiness, thoughts of unworthiness, thoughts of giving up. However, the message came at the right time from Pastor Tan. Amazing man, and I really love him. Haha.. Thank God for placing such wonderful pastors in City Harvest Church.

Have you ever wonder what is the purpose of copying notes in church, but after Service, you will not look through them again? I have been thinking about that for sometime. We may receive so many revelations from pastors, CGL, but we just copy and forget. Maybe, one day I should dig out my old notebook again. . . . . . Hopefully the revelations won't end up in the stomach of termites. =P

Sometime you do not realise that your silence is killing me in a slow and painful way.

:: Mountain Trembling Week ::

2008-09-03T22:56:00.003+08:00

This week has been terrible. It's one of the worst week that I have ever experience when I started work. One case after another, 2 setback with 2 days! What worse can it get? God, I really can't take it anymore. I wish that I could just leave everything behind and take a break. I am tired. I am just so tired. . .

It's indeed been a mountain trembling week, and its seems to be a thousand fall.

:: Should It Matters? ::

2008-08-31T15:28:00.002+08:00

I love this song. =) I love songs, music which are smoothing to ears, calming to the spirit and soul. I don't really like those heavy metal music, techno which are deafening to ears, more of noise pollution to me. Haha... No offense to those techno music lovers. =P But of course, church music may seems loud but they are very different, because you know what you are singing and the atmosphere is different. I'm not the type of "high" people, therefore, I don't like to go clubbing and all sort of activities, not because I want to act "holy", but its just me lor. Haha.. We're created all differently, aren't we? =)

Bought a copy of Straits Times on Saturday and I will be looking through for job opportunities later. =D It's a time to say goodbye to my current workplace in a month's time when contract ends. 1 month will fly past quickly, just like how 2 years of NS flew past me. I will not forget God's provision for me in this 2 months, indeed, He have bless me with some experience in work that I will never forget. Thank You God for helping me in this 2 months in work.

James 1:5
If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him.

:: Stress ::

2008-08-30T01:07:00.002+08:00

Maybe, I am not suitable for this. I don't have the capacity to handle such stress and the capacity to contain the heavy workload. Not exactly heavy, but it's quite alot for me. People say that you don't look how big the problem is, but look at how big God is and there's nothing that He can't do for us if we have the faith and ask for it. It's quite true, but I feel that it's giving me unnecessary stress.

Today Cell Group message was very good. It really spoke to my heart. Everything that I own belongs to God, and I shouldn't "complain" that why God gave others more than what He gave me. God gave everyone something, but He cannot give everyone everything. If He does, people will not see the point of having God in their lives, because they themself can do without God.

I will start to look for better job opportunities soon. Although I love the working environment, the workload is a heavy burden to me. I can't really handle it well. What's the point of staying when my heart seems to be miles apart? Looks like my heart has come out to a final conclusion.

28 more days...

:: Monday Blues ::

2008-08-25T01:02:00.003+08:00

It's a Sunday midnight, or rather, you can call it early Monday morning. Not really looking to work as I want to have more rest. But, I shall confess that I am looking forward to it cuz if I have the "Sianz" spirit, my work will be very "sianz", but if I have the positive spirit, my work will be a delight! Thanks Simon for your 3'P' and the big G. "Patience, Perseverance & Persistence". The big G, refers to the Big God. =)

2 more weeks, Aaron & Yan Qiu will be sending forth to Tekong. I will really miss them, their fellowship. I really pray that they can adapt well in a whole new environment over there. Thinking back of how I first enter into a complete new world in 2006, tears flow down when I lie on my bed the first night. No one sees it, no one hears it. Inside my heart, I really wish to be with my family members, my friends. I don't want to be there, neither I want to be confine. The feeling was really down. Sleeping with 10 complete strangers in a room for the first few nights, how can you excuse yourself where Singapore is so near yet so far away? Where can you find the familiar faces, the brotherly embrace, a listening ear at night? A bed that you have been sleeping for the past few years, a room that have watches you grow up, they are no longer with you. This is a terrible stage that I have to go through during the period.

Maybe, this is the feeling that I have gone through during that period of time, and that's why I feel so much for them. Of course, they need not to have the same feeling with me, but I pray that God can really bless them with good section mates, commanders and officers, or at least a christian in their section, and they can share and build each other up during the trainings, etc.

For Kelvin, more or less he's getting used to the lifestyle, but his happiness is gone. He's no longer smiling as he used to, the laughter that he used to joke with the TP guys in our CG. A stage whereby boys turn to men, has cause so much unhappiness to men. I pray that one day the joyful spirit will return in him.

If you were to ask me to go through the stage in BMT again, I would surely have the same feeling as I used to when I have back in BMT, although I just ORD in June. Maybe, I have seen more skies than the trees and have gotten used to them, that's why green doesn't sound appealing to me.

Let the spirit of joy always be with the NS guys, forever and ever more. Amen.

:: Plans ::

2008-08-18T20:32:00.003+08:00

SIM are finally open for registration. Looking at my current state, do I like office work? Yes, I like. However, I feel that if I were to apply for Human Resource Management course, I cannot progress very far in this career, as young, pretty and handsome people will overtake and snatch the rice bowl. Am I right to comment that, I wonder?

Should I go for designing? Well, I like designing too, but I don't have the creative cells in me. I feel that it's not enough to fight with others based on the simple things that I have created. Maybe, I have too much expectation of myself or either, I am right.

So, where should I go? I have been dragging about my life time decision for a long time, since I enter NS.. That was 2 yrs ago.. O_0.. Alot of things that I have consider to pursue before.

#1) Chef - I rejected because I don't want to sacrifice my weekends. Looking at how strict the master chef is on TV, I better think twice for a weak heart of mine.

#2) Designing - I have consider of going with NAFA or LASELLE before. Considering the facts that I have to produce a port folio, I can't do that, plus lacking of creative cells.

#3) HR - The rice bowl won't last for long. Young people are always in demand, and you can't be remain young forever.

Other options includes Home designing, full time ministry in Chorus Board, etc. So many things, what should I choose? A path that I take by choices, or when opportunity arises, which one should I choose?

God, lead my way. . .

:: Serving @ JW ::

2008-08-17T17:51:00.003+08:00

It was good. It could be the first time that I do the Main Board in a service. The last time that I do could be during PM @ JW, or either @ Expo. (Most probably abt a year ago) I am glad that I have move on, and I had set ahead of my goal that I have set starting this year in ministry wise. =)

Although I only do one song, "Perfect Love". I was glad that I was given the opportunity to do the song. When my team leader ask me, I hesistate for quite some time, but then, I decided to give it a try, its now or never. Looking forward to do more worship songs and praise songs in JW!

Hopefully by end 2009 or early 2010, I can move on to do annoucements, offering verse, sermons, etc. It's a challenge as you have to be alert, sharp in the spirit, and to flow with pastors. Ohh.. Still trying to get use of the huge LED screen @ Expo. Haha.. Chorus Board has gone up to a higher level so fast, in terms of the new LED screen, the graphics, etc. That's why maybe Rev. Dr. C. Peter Wagner are invited to CHC to preach, to slow things done. Hehe.. =P

:: Tired ::

2008-08-17T00:22:00.005+08:00

Service today was quite different. We had a 2 min conversation with our "neighbours" and I get to know a guy call Lawrence. He's from SOT and he's anchor in JW service. Quite a friendly guy and he is only in church for 1 yr plus, coming Christmas is his 2 yrs. A cool looking and a mature christian. Though he may be young in the Lord, but he has grew so much in faith, so much on fire for God. A amazing testimony to younger christians that the young can be mature, not just for the older christians.

I was quite surprise when he told me that. I though that he could be grow up from Children Church, or be in church for quite sometime already. Haha. Well, so what if you have been in church for 5, 7 or even 10 years? You could be there physically, but your hearts may not be with God. (Something that I need to do. . . . . .)

I want to sleep for much, and I almost felt asleep during Service. So tired physically and mentally as I did not have a proper sleep for the past few nights. How I wish that I can just stay at home and sleep. Sleep and sleep and sleep.

:: Angry ::

2008-08-13T00:37:00.003+08:00

I am so angry with this particular girl. You should know who you are. If you think that you still have a heart, please do what you are suppose to do. Unless your heart is being eaten up, I have nothing else to say. This is not the first time that it has happen.

I advise you to take a look into a mirror, what to you see? If you are in my position as a friend and you were to see your reflection, how would you think of this friend? Unless you never treat me as a friend at all, well, I would be more than happy to end this friendship and buried it 6 feet underground in a cemetry where nobody know.

:: I'm back (Part 2) ::

2008-08-11T01:24:00.002+08:00

Last Sat is a National Day, and I am required to work. I was pretty happy because in just a day, my pay cross over $100. Haha.. It was really a joy to have abundance in my bank, not yet banked in but soon. Haha.. Of course, money is always not enough. Well, not because I am greedy, but there are alot of things that I need to buy. Sometimes I wish to bless people too. =)

Service was great with Pastor Tan @ JW today. I love hearing his stories of how he started serving in Sound Ministry, following by taking part in Inter-Church Sports day, and how he started to serve in dance ministry in Easter drama, and then that's how he get into creative arts and then he get to know Pastor Kong & Sun. Through that, he take up driving license and then he will drive Pastor around. Cool right? I never knew that my No. 2 man in church, Pastor Tan can dance. Haha.. Oh ya, the whole congregation was shock too I guess, cuz he look so "Si Wen".. Laughter roar across the whole auditorium and everyone applause for him. Haha..

My dad's birthday is today. My siblings and I went to do some shopping at JP and we work together and cook a dinner for him. This is the first year we buy a cake for him too, and he was very happy. He smiled! Haha.. In the past, we didn't buy for him cuz he always say he don't want a cake. Well, this year, we just buy. It's not abt the cake I guess, but it's about honoring. He always work so hard for the family, and it's not easy to bring up 6 kids. Next time, I really hope that I can have the capacity to bring him to a restaurant to eat. =)

It's going to a tiring week this week. Work starts @ 8.30a.m and end till 6p.m or 8p.m. Tired but happy. =) Maybe if I can, I will go to Heart of God Church for the morning prayer meetings, cuz travelling to my workplace will be easier and I can reach on time. Well, maybe next week when my work starts @ 9a.m.

Good Night...

:: I'm back! ::

2008-07-27T01:56:00.004+08:00

It has been a pretty long time since I blog. Maybe about 2 weeks? My flesh has been physically tired due to work, and there will be more to come for the next 2 - 3 weeks. This is due to more work load that is coming up, and I will also be working on National Day. Well, I am pretty happy because firstly there's no service on that day and it won't affect my church timing and my pay is double! Haha..

I have decided to let go on certain areas that I am struggling for a long time. There would be times when I face temptations, but I don't wish to hurt God's feeling anymore. He has been so good to me, so good. . . I can't depend on my own strength to have a complete breakthrough, and I want to cling on His strength. There might be times when I go through the cycle again, but I want to run to Him even more, because there's no one else above God to seek the source from. (I pray that this will be crave in my heart and my mind always)

Service was really good. I really need to repent because I . . . . (Si Hui will know). During Prayer Meeting, I apologise to God and I asked for His forgiveness. I pray for a word that will come in season that will really touch my heart, and so it did. =) Pastor Derek gave an altar call for those who feel weary, and I went forward with Louisa. I can really feel God's touch when one of the Pastor lay hands on me, either Pastor Tan or Pastor Aries. When I fall onto the ground, my face was hot, but I don't know why. When I fall onto the ground, my shirt was lifted up and thus my stomach was being EXPOSED! Not totally but about 1/4 of it. I was really embrassed and I don't know how should I react. Thankfully the ushers or the security cover it with a towel. (I always thought that is only meant for sisters!) Maybe I am the first brother in the whole CHC history to use it. O_O

W421 is experiencing a growth. Our total membership have hit above 15 and it was really a good sign for more growth. Wei Jian brought a new frenz, Bernard, for service today, and he is only sec 1. Quite a cute but playful boy. Hahaa.. We went over to Terminal 3 for a time of fellowship. Was quite glad to have Kelvin back with us and he look really different! It's really not easy for him as he was in the enhanced batch, so everything was like very rush for him. Kelvin, stay strong k? Will keep you in prayers. =)

CG will change back to Friday as there's no house available to use on Sunday, thus, it's back to Friday CG again and I'm glad that this arrangement is make as I can continue to serve at JW again. I am really happy to serve over there because I felt that I grow together with the service. From the starting week that I serve in JW, the Powerhouse section was not really filled. Slowly, it kept on adding people, and 2 weeks ago, it was really jam pack all the way to the back! It's just an ordinary service, no special speakers! It's really a joy to see Service 4 growing although I am not anchor in that service, but it's a sign that hitting 30,000 is happening real soon.

Having a outreach later on at Holland V. Pray that frenzs will be really impacted by the fellowshipping of the saints, and members will greatly enjoy the fun! Good night! =)

:: Updates ::

2008-07-06T15:40:00.005+08:00

Wednesday
Work starts! Did I mentioned that I am working at SP Services? I am currently working as a backroom admin and I am processing customers request on termination of the utilities services, such as people moving out of the unit or offices, etc. It quite a good working environment as I love office work, and the 8 - 5 office jobs. Although my interest is very much in F & B, but I don't like to sacrifice my weekends. Weekends are meant for church and my rest time. =)

Thursday
Second day of work. It was good to be attach around to various department. Quite a good experience as I get to know more about the company. They have their own food court too, and I am amazed that the prices are cheap! In Orchard area where can find food cheap as the normal coffee shop at our HDB estate? Thank God for such surprises! I had a Xiao Wan Mian as my lunch and it only cost $3! Haha.. The soup base is really delicious and the noodles portion are quite generous as well. Haha..

Went over to Suntec later for Prayer Meeting. Walk from Orchard to there. Since I knock off at 6p.m and it only start at 7.30p.m, why not I take my own sweet time to go there instead of taking MRT? Haha.. Save $$$, and it's also a good form of exercise. (You will see that it's really a good form of exercise as I explain further)

From Somerset, I walk and walk. Past by our affiliated church, Heart of God Church. Walk past Dhoby Ghaut MRT, walked past SMU, etc. To save money, I decided to go to the "Four Horse Road" (Direct Translation from chinese) market to have a light dinner. To my dismay, it is close for upgrading. Went over to the temporary set up market, it's still not open yet. Walk for so long, and to find out that. No choice but to go to somewhere and eat, so I settle my stomach with one $2 double cheese burger at the Bugis McDonald's. Meet my budget. =P

Well, so it was yet another long walk from Bugis to Suntec City, but I don't mind. As long as I can find my way there, even though I have to climb up several mountains, I will still go. Haha.. =P I just love our church office. It was just so good to be there, especially when we pray together, and I could really feel God's presence when we pray, and it's so good. Haha..

Friday
Another day that I am looking forward to. Start to get a hands on experience and it was good. =) My mentor was quite a nice and patient guy in teaching me. The other staff who is doing the same job as me are quite friendly people too, and I really thank God for such wonderful people. Need more time to get to know them more as I am the person who don't really open up to people. So, hopefully by end of Sep I can get to know them even better, not just by their names.

Went to CG after that. Had a quick dinner at Sharon's house downstairs. Thank God for another $2 meal. All target meet. Haha.. CG was good as Sharon talks about relationships. Hmm... Well, sometimes, we got to learn to handle our emotions well even when others will mistreat us, we got to be honest with our feelings, and not try to hit it. Eventually, your hurts will come out one day, and that day might be too late le.

Saturday
Work till 1p.m and then head down to PS to get presents for Kelvin and Hui Shan. Bought a cake from Secret Recipe and I think that it could be quite delicious. Haha.. Had a hard time searching for cards as some wordings are not so nice one. After some time of searching, manage to find something which is ok. The cards are quite $$$. Prices shall not be reveal here as Kel and Shan might read. Haha.. Anyway, there's a cute winnie the pooh that caught my attention with a red colour specs. I fall in love with it when I saw that, and I guess that it might be a good present for Shan, so I bought that too.

Went to the John Little Mega Expo sale after that. Meet up with Aaron and Yan Qiu to go shop around. The prices that are still ok. Bought myself a grey colour office wear which cost $14. Walk around the hall till legs are aching. Same comments go for Aaron and Yan Qiu too.

Service was wonderful with Rev Mike Connell. He is such a Fatherly person and I really like the way he laugh. It's just so loving. =) Many people are set free in the service and it was good. We celebrate Hui Shan's birthday after that and I am glad that she likes the Pooh Bear. So comparable with her when she put the small little cute bear beside her. Hahaha.. Ops.. We also appreciate Kel as he will not be around for 2 weeks, hope that he can really be strong in NS. Jia You Kelvin!

Fellowship at Bedok after that. Food was nice and I order myself a Mee Pok. Great time eating with the brothers in the same table. =) Glad to have Glenn joining us for dinner as well. Jia You for your studies Glenn Kong Kong!

:: Tuesday ::

2008-07-01T17:13:00.003+08:00

Financial Blessings have come to past!!

On Monday, which is yesterday, my dad bless me with $50.
On Tuesday, which is today, the government bless me with $200.
On Wednesday, which is tomorrow, will I get a $800 blessings? Haha..

Really thank God for His provision throughout this dry season of mine. It's really a miracle for me that I am able to have financial blessings when things seems impossible to me. Where would the money come from?

On top of that, I have been selected to work! I will be starting work tomorrow, and I have to report at 8.45a.m. Haha.. The job payment system also works in a very good way, which means I will get paid 2 times per month, but it will take another week to process. Anyway, what more can I asked for? God is really a good God. =)

I just signed up for MySavings Account through POSB. I think that this would be a good way to help me to save money. I "pledge" to save $50 every month and it will be deducted on the 25th of a new month. It's really pathetic to see my current bank account fall less than $500, which is suppose to be the amount inside or $2 will be deducted.

I will also be starting to have a personal book of my expenses for every month starting July. Every dollar and every cents, I will pay attention to it. This is a good way to keep track where my money go, and in which area I should cut down my expenses. It will mainly be tithe, handphone bills, transportation allowance, food, and some miscellaneous items such as refreshments for CG, stationery, etc.

Hopefully, through all this steps, I can see a financial breakthroughs in my life. =)

:: Me ::

2008-06-30T00:01:00.002+08:00

It's been quite sometime since I blog. Maybe just like Pascale, I have lost the interest in blogging. Maybe, it could be due to my emotion that I am going through, I don't really feel like talking, I feel that it's hard for me to open up to people. I wish that I can share what I am going through with people, but it's just too hard for me.

Last Saturday, my zone have a meeting at Riverwalk. I was suppose to reach there by 0930 for training for catcher, but I overslept. The actual meeting starts at 1130. I was thinking of going for the meeting anot, because my ez-link card value is depleting, and I have no money to top up, nor to have a proper meal. It's either I don't have money to top up, or I don't have money to eat. I hesitate for a very long time, then I decided to go. I have a quick bath, because my dad can fetch me to Boon Lay MRT before he go to work. He was actually outside having breakfast with some of my siblings. However, I was about to finish drying myself and he came back. He was not able to wait for me as he was in a hurry. I came out of the toilet, it was 1035. Actually, I was thinking of borrowing money from him first, but I didn't have a chance. I don't know what to do, I was in a loss, I felt emo. It's just so hard for me to go out. Should I just skip Expo service and go for Jurong West service for a time being? It's just a 7 min walk from my house. Can save up to $5 of transportation fees from my house to Expo, and from Expo to my house.

Maybe, I was just going through what Henry is going through after he ORD. No money for travelling, and that's why sometimes it's really hard for him to join us for dinner. You watch people eat and you don't. Maybe, it's good to have blessings from the members once in awhile, but if every week that happens, you won't really feel good at all.

My main concern now is to get a job and save some money. I will be going for a interview tomorrow at Somerset. Hopefully I am able to get the job, although I will miss the chance to go for Saturday zone prayer meetings in future. I couldn't wait anymore, this could be one of the best opportunities for me to earn money. Anyway, I can still go for CG, Service 2, and able to serve in ministry, so it won't be any big issue.

Emotion dying, verge of going insane. . . . .

I Surrender All - True Worshippers

2008-06-24T19:29:00.001+08:00

Thank You for the cross that You have paid
For all my sins You’ve sacrificed Yourself
I am nothing Lord without Your grace
You were there to lift me when I failed

As I lift my hands
Pour Your mercy O God
Longing for Your presence now

I surrender all and I will follow You
I surrender all and bring my life to You
I surrender all and live my life for You
I surrender all, I surrender all
To You Jesus

:: Internet Breakdown ::

2008-06-19T23:54:00.004+08:00

Internet or modem have emotion? Yes they do. :'( A lightning cause a loud strike and my modem was terrify, thus causing him to shutdown. So, please don't bully your modem. Let it have some rest yeah?

Right now, I am attaching to another Internet source near my house there, Uheaven. A place that is set up quite some months ago or a year ago. Although the place is not really built up so nice, but at least it still have Internet access.

I promise about blogging the BIGBANG Camp. Somehow, I have lost the interest le. =P All I can say is, I really enjoyed this camp alot although I miss the Pulau Ubin trip due to having a dental appointment at NUH in the morning. Anyway, its really cool to be in the camp. My house is Amplified, and my team is Ai-Chong! Haha..

I would like to thank Wei Jian specially. Thanks for standing by me all this while and encourage me to go to camp. Although there were many times I am tempted not to go, but still, I went for it. Thank you so much. Not forgetting Sharon, you have been my emotional support. =) Lastly, all glory goes up to Jesus for keeping me safe throughout the camp! =)

:: Back from Camp!! ::

2008-06-13T20:49:00.001+08:00

I'm back from BigBang Camp! The 3 days and 2 nights was a fun one. =) Shall blog more when I'm free! =)

:: Service ::

2008-06-08T23:47:00.002+08:00

It's a long walk from Expo MRT station to Hall 1, but the walk seems to be shorten compare to the previous time. Probably it could be due to more exhibitions in Expo than the past when the church shifted to Hall 1? Or probably I was day dreaming while I was walking? Well, anyway, the most important thing is that I can get to go to church on time. =)

We had 3 new frenzs for Service! 2 are from my Connect Group brought by Derek, and they are Ruyi and Ryan. Both of them are just so cute in Jesus name. =P Another frenz is Vivian, who belongs to Kelvin's Connect Group. It's indeed great to see new frenzs keep coming, and that's the power of Prayer! Guess what, we have been conceiving Ruyi in our prayers for a week, and during the altar call, she gave her heart to Jesus! Praise The Lord!! =)

Service was great with Rev. Dr. Robb Thomson. He talks about having abundance in our lives, and about how our life with God. Shall blogged down a few points what he shared impacted me.
1. God will never give you a future that makes Him unnecessary.
2. A life without a harvest is proof you have invested in the wrong people.
3. Giving to God what belongs to Him guarantees God giving to us what grace provides.

God will never give us something that will cause us to be prideful, to declare independence from Him. All of us need God, and we have to make Him to be part of our lives. God is a part of our lives, not apart! He deserve to be the greatest portion in our lives. Well, every time I talk about this, I will feel really guilty. I guess, I must be a doer of my word. I don't want to come to a point whereby I lost something in the end, because the only cure for ingratitude is lost.

After the service, we went over to PS to fellowship. Had tempura chicken set for dinner, which cost me about $4.50, thanks to Yan Qiu for the 10% discount. Hahaa.. Food is not bad, and it was a good time playing the game after that outside PS. We played "Big Fish & Small Fish", and I keep pronouncing fish wrongly, with all kind of funny words. Got shift, shit, etc. Guess I am too much into doing shift in my NS. O_O Hahaha...

Didn't joined them for movies. Wanted very much to go but I have not enough. Prayed that I can have a stable job soon and I would have allowance. =) I want a financial breakthrough in my life! =)

:: ORD ::

2008-06-07T01:50:00.002+08:00

The 2 years of journey has come to an end. I have been looking forward to this day for a long long time. In this 2 years, it has given me opportunities working together with different people. It has give me a glimpse of how outside the working world would be like, and I feel that it has been great to be in this unit where I am posted to.

I have mixed feelings when I leave my camp. Looking at some of the buildings that I used to go and the corridors that I have once walk, somehow, there's a feeling of sadness in departing them. Although there would be times of unhappiness, but there are times whereby I laugh together with my friends too. I can say that this place build up some meaningful relationships with my friends, and this is also the place where I like someone so deeply but I didn't confess. Seriously, I have never been so deeply attracted to people before. Hahaa.. Well, somethings are meant to keep for a secret. No worries, I have not been so addicted to this person as much as before, I am slowly giving up thinking and meditating upon this relationship. =P Must slowly let go want mah, how can so fast say I don't love you and immediately next day I don't love you liao? LOL.. Feelings are hard to die off. Anyway, that issue shall reserve for the future.

I feel quite elated when I get my pink IC! Haha.. It's been 2 years being "locked" up. Hahaa.. Embarking a new journey in 2008!! =) 3 more days to BigBang Camp! :D

:: Stepping Out ::

2008-06-01T22:37:00.003+08:00

Today was second time serving in Jurong West, but I was serving at the different spot of the auditorium, which is the area where PowerHouse used to be. That area was "anointed" as the spot was pretty cold and I keep trembling. Maybe I should wear a jacket with me next time when I serve.

While the management are still testing and running the new side board, I will be doing the projector system where by I will be flashing the BV 5 lines. Had a SOT student at my side to understudy. Haha.. Well, I am not really nervous as the SOT student has some experience while she serve in the SOT lesson. =)

The experience over at Expo and Jurong are really different. Over at Expo, the equipments have been set up nicely for you, and all you have to do is just to flow with the song and flash the lyrics. However, Jurong West you will have to do the setting up yourself, and I am not quite good at it. Had a good scolding from Rosa cuz she has taught me the previous week but I have forgotten. =P Well, not really a scolding but the expectation of me has gone up to another level. I should learn to "take charge" of the situation. Every single little details I must pay attention of, borrowing power supply from other ministry, laying the extension wires (it must be taped up nicely if not people will trip and fall), if the PowerHouse section is filled where I should be sitting, setting up the area, etc. Seriously, all these will not come into my mind. Chorus Board really can trained people to move into spirit of excellance, and I believe that's the DNA of City Harvest Church.

Had a great time today with my ex team over at Bishan BBQ-ing. The condo there is super nice and beautiful, look like a palace. Haha.. Kelvyn shared about his vision in this ministry and it was really good. Really hope to grow more in this ministry and grow in the Lord. =)

:: Service, Ministry ::

2008-05-25T16:18:00.004+08:00

Served at Jurong West today. It was a good experience for me as I have never serve in the Main Service at Jurong before. I was quite nervous, and I was feeling quite cold too, keep "trembling" under the power of Air-Con. O_O Haha..

There was some mistakes that I make in the service, but God was good. I managed to run the BV 5 lines smoothly and is able to flash the lyrics on time. =) Looking forward for more of such experiences in the near future.

I might not be serving in Expo anymore. My new team leader, Jacelyn, who is also my Ex-Leader before the English Service starts at Jurong said that she will discussed with Kelvyn and see hows the arrangement like. =) I am quite sad if I couldn't serve at Expo, because I just started to develop relationships with people over there, and the usual laptop that I used. Haha.. Well, it's good to move on to the next level, leaving my comfort zone.

Understand the message better when I attended the Service again. It was good as I have more revelations. =D I want to have intimacy with God more. ;-)

:: Cellgroup ::

2008-05-24T03:02:00.004+08:00

Cellgroup was especially different tonight, and I can really feel God so close to me. When Sharon gave an altar call to those who felt a vacuum in their hearts, I lifted up my hand. I can picture Jesus in my mind, and it seems so real, He stretched out His hands, and He held onto my hands. Just like a bridegroom stretching out his hands to the bride, and wanting the bride to be his forever.

Prayer is indeed very important. Even non-Christians know the importance of prayers and they pray to the idols everyday. I will see my dad offer joysticks everyday without fail. Even non-Christians can be so devoted, Christians should be even more be delight in seeking God! One thing we know for sure, God exist and He is real. So doesn't that makes us to pray even more?

I need to repent. . . While I was typing this, somehow, it speak to me. I really need to pray more, and need to humble myself. No matter how tired I may be, I want to pray. Prayers are so important that it can create miracles.

We played the "Passing the Current Game" in CG. Kelvin and I was being forfeited. :'( Haha.. Sharon says that Kelvin and me are not the usual ones being forfeited. Indeed, not only we have to raise up a new generation of leaders, we have to raise up a new generation of "forfeitters" too. LOL.. =P

:: Ministry ::

2008-05-23T11:49:00.004+08:00

I will be going over to Jurong West to serve this Sunday. I was quite happy when Si Hui called and asked if I could serve. Well, I didn't expect it to be so soon. Haha..

The software that they used is different from the one over at side board. They will be using the software that they used at the main board. Sounds pretty exciting.. Haha.. I remembered how badly I fare when I do the main board at Jurong West during one of the Prayer Meetings in 2006/2007. Haha.. That's so long ago. However, I believed in myself and I can conquer my failures this time round. =)

God, gave me the wisdom and alertness as I begin to serve this Sunday. It may be practise only, but I still want to serve you with the best of my ability.

One thing Su Ping said, "If Jesus were to serve in your position, what will He do?". I am sure He will learn to take charge of the whole situation, having the responsibility and every single small details to be take note of. He will ensure that everything will run smoothly and what are the things that need to prepare for before hand, and ensuring that the Service run well. =)